AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Natural Born Killer

by GatesVengeance

schedule January 4, 2011 at 12:00 AM
stake, not steak
and i hate the ending!
schedule January 4, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I can't believe Vengeance killed Synyster, juat to be king of Hell. I can't imagine Hell being that exciting. Anyways, the story was really good, I liked all the blood. I can't wait for a new story. =)
schedule December 27, 2010 at 12:00 AM
i HATE cliffhangers!!!
grr, who is the slumped figure?!
is it Vengeance?!
schedule December 24, 2010 at 12:00 AM
i LOVE that u put Rev in it!
schedule December 23, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I can't believe you added The Rev into the story! XD It made me so happy!!! Thank you. The greatest Christmas gift ever! I can't wait for the next chapter, I wanna know what Vengeance and Gates are going to come up with.
schedule December 19, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I love this story. I wish I could focus on mine and put it up on here. Anyways keep up the great work. I'll be waiting. =)
schedule December 18, 2010 at 12:00 AM
just...wow!
schedule December 16, 2010 at 12:00 AM
yeah, take that lucifer!
schedule December 16, 2010 at 12:00 AM
This story is getting very interesting! I love it!!! Keep updating hun!!!!
schedule December 16, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Yay! Perfect cap for my last day of finals. I'm so glad Zacky said no, but what's going to happen to Synyster?

Two quick things:
You use the word "Wicked" several times, I would suggest variation. Using a word too many times is kind of like saying a curse word over and over, it loses its punch after the third or fourth repetition.

The second is a spelling thing, at the end I believe you mean to say "Pique his interest." not "Peak"

That's all I've got, update again soon!