Gotta knock a little harder

Disclaimer: I don't own these people, and you know it!

A/N Blah, read Blood read October first, please, since I ment it to be read first!

We found a new singer to our band… at first he wasn’t the leading singer, just a back round singer. Now he’s the leading singer. Well, I don’t really care. As long as I can play my guitar, everything is fine. He’s just like everyone else, he can’t see through me, can’t crack my shell. I’m happy ‘cause he can’t. I don’t want anyone to ever crack my shield. It’s not safe, I might get hurt. As I did, when I didn’t have my shield. But when I didn’t have my shell, did I exist? I mean, all I am, is my shell, I am nothing more, just an empty shell. You see, when I was a little boy, I was very unhappy. Terrible things happened to me and that is why I changed like this. That is how I came so cold and afraid of human. Anyway now Kami walks towards me.

-Hi Mana, how are you doing?
-As always, Mana said, not even laying his eyes on Kami
-Yeah… what did you do on weekend?
-The same as usually.
-And what’s that?
-Nothing special
-Oh, okay… do you want me to leave you alone
-Could you?
-Yes, of course.

And so Kami left, as quickly as he had came. It was always like this. This was how Manas shell did work. He always had the same expression; he never looked people to their eyes. He always answered very shortly and never, never tried to make a conversation with anyone, except on work things. He could have talked hours for nothing specific; he could have talked hours about things that really mattered. He was very smart and sharp like a knife. No one just knew about it, ‘cause he never talked to anyone.

-I think that we can stop the rehearsal for today! Manas voice cut the silence
-Can we start tomorrow a bit later, Gackt, their new singer whined from the other side of the room.
- Why, Gackt?
-Well… I can’t stand early mornings, I can’t wake up so early.
-Ten o’ clock is not early; besides, you are not a child anymore. You got to get used to the adult’s scary world, to the work. Mana was feeling sarcastic today and Gackt knew he had lost the battle.
-Ten o’ clock it is then, precious leader-sama... Gackt said knowing that he could never win Mana.

I’ve been thinking… about our leader, Mana. There’s something about him. I don’t just know what it is… well, firstly I’m of course grateful for the chance that this band has given to me. And cause he’s the leader of this band (with Közi), I should be grateful for him. I mean the last decision about picking me up to this band was about him. But that’s just not what I mean. There’s something more, and I can’t explain it even to myself. I mean, even though he’s so cold and everything… oh I don’t know if he’s cold, I don’t know what he’s like on his spare time, I only know this professional Mana. But somehow I think that he’s the same on his spare time, at least when he’s with other people. I mean, if he’s with other people… every time, we go out drinking with the rest of the band, he just politely says no thanks and makes up some excuse. I would just like to get to know him better. Oh, well… maybe some other day.

Please review, if you read it!