It's Only Life

Chapter 1

I wasn't quite sure when it started or even why it had happened. I wasn't sure when the idea stopped frightening me, but without a shadow of a doubt, there was one thing I was certain of: I wanted Kyo.

The man is insane, or perhaps, just inescapably himself to a degree that nobody else is. His lack of height is made up for in an abundance of personality and even sheer energy when he feels a situation is worthy enough. Kyo is the best when he is happy; with his throaty laughter and teasing actions being his weapons of choice. The Kyo that makes me smile and wish to be close to him.

This is most unlike the sad, raw Kyo that I have seen far too often. The one that will kill you before letting you comfort him. The one that will get furious and self-loathing… The one who will cry and cry to himself, nonsensical noises slipping from his small body, thinking that he is alone… The Kyo that makes me feel like my chest is aching, about to cave in, with sympathy for something I know I can’t stop. The Kyo that makes me fight tears and wish to be help to him.

Then, there is the onstage persona; the other facet of him that emerges before the masses. That monstrous, lithe, roaring Kyo who can rush from one end of the stage to another while he chokes on some deep, sensual scream. He has laughed manically and then scraped the skin from his chest, close to his heart, or slit the skin on his wrists so he could taste himself. The Kyo who the fans adore and the Kyo who I have admired, feared, and loved, all at once.

I am also aware of my own labels and how other people see me; how I sometimes see myself. I am the leader, stoic and cold at times. While the others interact with one another, I can be found keeping to myself onstage lately, unless one of the others prompts me to join them. This is not who I really am; I am a normal person who craves the company and interaction of another human being. I, too, desire the simple, base things that are required to function properly. Of course, every person has many sides to them, be it Kyo or myself.
 

[Note: This is short, I'm sorry. But this story was really badly written and I've attempted to lengthen the following chapters.]