Whose Universe Are We In?

9

It was Alan that noticed it, reading as he was one night, Harry’s diary onscreen. “Dan, did you finish doing this diary only this page seems to be the last and it’s the middle of a sentence”. Blinking, Dan peered over his shoulder, “Oh, that’s ‘cos the next page is stuck down, looks like dried coffee or something and I tried to separate it from the back cover but it started to rip a bit and I don’t want to spoil it in any way, though I doubt that this would be the sort of memoir our Boy Hero would want publishing”, he snickered.

He squinted as he peered at the writing, “Why do you ask? Is the only interesting bit stuck down?” Alan snickered, “Well the last few paragraphs may hold interest. I’d like to know what this ‘experiment’ was that they were working on. Harry makes a few oblique references to it but there’s no specifics. There’ll be paper-work relating to this somewhere downstairs, probably in the deep bunker, but look at this”, and he scrolled back a few pages.

“the experiment went well today. We are learning how to focus directly on specific times and places. We will have it perfected soon, we are getting better at it, then we will be free, my beloved and I......”

Alan pointed at the screen, “What do you make of that?” Dan read the short piece and shrugged, “Dunno, it’s a bit vague but you’re probably right, we haven’t really come across their research yet, it’s probably really well hidden”.

So that became their focus of the next few days. They went over the deep bunker in it’s fully configured state many times searching out any slight clues but could find no cupboard that was locked against them, no unexpected wards nor yet even any depictions of snakes that might be hiding something that only parseltongue could reveal. They were stumped and frustrated.

“If they were experimenting, then there’s notes somewhere”, Alan said for the umpteenth time. Dan was ready to throttle him. He knew that. That’s what they were looking for; what they’d been looking for, for almost a week but they were drawing a complete blank. Transfiguring a pool again in the cave, they went swimming though Dan wasn’t trying very hard, Alan was thrashing out the lengths and didn’t stop until he’d tired himself out.

Over the next two days they went to the first layer down and searched that, again going over every square inch of wall and surface, cupboard and drawer, Dan even lifted the lid on the toilet cistern. They were getting nowhere.

They were sitting in the main bedroom for now, sprawled on the bed dressed in nought but their dressing gowns. They were taking a day’s break while Alan browsed the documents that Dan had already scanned in. Dan called a house-elf and asked for tea then paused the small creature before he disappeared. “Did any of you tidy these rooms after the Professor and Harry disappeared?”

The elf nodded slowly, his eyes large and round, “Yes, Mr Dan, sir, Professor Dumbledore asks Dobby and Winky to do it sir, Dobby was Mr Harry Potter’s free elf, sir”. Alan looked up from his reading as Dan said, “Ask Mr Dobby if he’d come and see me, would you?” The elf nodded and popped out of sight.

A few minutes later and the elf appeared again with the tea tray along with two other elves. Dan smiled at Dobby and bowed slightly as he introduced his wife, Winky, who blushed and hiccupped at the respect these muggles were showing. Dan kept the smile on his face, “Did either of you tidy away any papers, parchments, books or any written materials from these rooms. I am looking for any work that Harry and the Professor were doing prior to them disappearing as we are trying to find out what happened to them”.

Dobby hung his head, “Mr Harry was working on serious magic sirs and he and Mr Snape had lots of papers, sirs but they made me promise not to give them to anybody and in case anything happened to them then me and Winky was to keep them and not to give them to the headmaster at all sirs. Neither Mr Potter nor the Professor trusted the headmaster properly sirs”.

Alan leaned forwards all agog, “We don’t trust the headmaster either, Dobby, we think he wants us to play the part of Harry and Severus until the war is over and then he plans to kill us to get us out of the way so we won’t be revealed for the muggles we really are, even though we have magic now. We need to know what Harry and Severus were working on as Dan and I think it’s what brought us here from our own world to this one”.

His tennis ball eyes narrowed and he looked warily from one man to the other and back again then the elf nodded, “I trust you. If what you say is true then you are in great danger from the Evil One who wants to rule the Magical World. I will get you the papers. Please wait one moment”, and he cracked out of sight.

A much louder crack presaged the elf’s reappearance followed by a thump and there was Dobby and what looked like a school trunk beside him. Dan thanked both of the elves and they cracked out of sight. Alan came over and hugged Dan, “Brilliant move, Sherlock”, and kissed him impulsively on the cheek then as one, they tentatively approached the trunk with their wands drawn.

They inspected the exterior. There was no way of knowing whose trunk it had been originally as the badge upon it was a Ravenclaw badge and the initials read ‘L.L’. “This isn’t either of theirs, is it?” Dan muttered. Beside him Alan shook his head, “No. Do we know if Harry’s friend from the books, what’s her name, Luna Lovechild still lives? The initials and the house would fit”

Dan turned beaming at his lover, “Hey, Watson, a fine suggestion. We’ll ask at the next meal”. They tried to open the thing and it stayed resolutely shut. They tried a variety of spells and charms and still the lid stayed glued tightly closed. They tapped it with wands, they shouted at it, they kicked it, they hammered on the lid, Dan even stood on it and jumped up and down but the lid didn’t budge and the hasp remained locked. Alan transfigured a chisel from the fire poker and a hammer from the iron shovel beside the fire and they assaulted it that way but the implements didn’t even splinter the wood around the lock. They were stumped.

They went down to dinner that night disgruntled and curious.

When Dan asked after Luna, Dumbledore quirked a brow, “Indeed, her and Harry are great friends and she is very much alive. Why do you ask?” Dan shrugged, “In the dungeon, we’ve found an old trunk with some of Harry’s bits and pieces in with her initials on and we wondered why he had her trunk”. Dumbledore shrugged lightly, “She did appear sporting a rather handsome antique portmanteau the last term so perhaps she has simply outgrown it. Knowing our Harry, he was a demon for, what is this new-fangled idea? Reed-cycling?

Dan and Alan were thoughtful as they wended their way back to their rooms after dinner. The trunk still stood, an intractable lump in the middle of the bedroom floor. Dan levitated it to the side of the room with his wand and muttered a few passwords at the lock for good measure. Nothing. He laid down his wand and started to ready himself for bed, sitting on the edge and staring at the trunk chewing his lip.

He could hear the sound of the shower and grinned at his lover’s off-key singing then had a thought, “Alan”, he called and had to call again before the man heard him. “What?”, the song stopped in mid-verse. “What was the name of the magazine Lovegood published?” There was a silence from the bathroom, “Not sure, the Enquirer? Erm, the Arguer? Oh, I can’t remember, why, is it important?” Dan shrugged, “Dunno, I just thought this thing might be password protected is all. Never mind”.

Alan’s interest was piqued but he didn’t get very far after emerging from the bathroom with only a towel around his hips. Dan jumped on him and had a nipple in his mouth as he still towelled his hair then blew on it to make it peak. Alan sighed and let himself be taken up by the mood, the low lighting and the deliciously randy boy who was pushing him over backwards onto the bed whilst removing his scant covering. The trunk could bloody well wait.

****

It was deep into the night when Dan sprang awake and sat up, his eyes straining in the inky dark. He wasn’t sure what had awakened him but he needed the loo so he fumbled for his wand under his pillow and lit the tip. Alan subconsciously turned from the light and Dan kissed the hump of his shoulder before slipping out of bed and padding to the bathroom.

He was idly listening to his stream in the pan when it came to him, The Quibbler, the name of the magazine. Bloody hell. He shook off and didn’t flush then quickly padded back across the stone, picked up his wand and turned off the light, pointing it at where he remembered the lump of trunk lay, whispering, “Quibbler”. In the dark he heard the hasp click open and hissed his joy, “Yesssss”.

This time he lit a candle and carried it over to the trunk, placing the tall candlestick on the ground beside the trunk and easing the lid open. It creaked. There was a sound from the bed and Dan whipped his head round but it was only Alan turning over. Dan didn’t move until his lover settled again and his breathing was deep and regular once more before he turned his attentions to the contents of the trunk.

It was stacked to the brim with papers at first glance. There looked like sheaves and sheaves of parchment held in bundles with what looked suspiciously like muggle elastic bands. Dan groaned softly, this lot was going to take some scanning in. He plucked a loose sheet from the top and cast his eyes over it. It was a letter. He brought it closer to the light and saw it was addressed to ‘Whomsoever gets into this trunk’. He blinked twice, that meant him then, and started to read.

“To whomsoever gets into this trunk,

Herein is everything you need to know about the experiment and how we did it, along with everything else we’ve researched over the last few years along with Severus’ half a lifetime’s research, some of which was done to commission from Voldemort and is consequently very Dark indeed.

Whoever has this letter in his/her hand has either killed me or the experiment worked. Either way, it’s odds on that you, the letter-reader is the one who will now have to take out Voldemort (to get as far as reading this will be no accident and whoever you are, welcome to being the new me. I hope I’ve got Daniel Radcliffe from those fakey movies that Skeeter wrote the books of. I’m told the actor looks really like me. Well, if this is you, Daniel, sorry, but I’ve landed you in a pile of shite. Voldemort’s still out there and he has to be fought. And killed. And I am tired. Very tired. I don’t want to kill. I’m sorry, but I’m bowing out as Saviour of the Wizarding World. I’d like to be the Boy-that-lived-until-he-was-an-old-bloke thank you very much and me and Severus are getting out.

We did actually try running away, but you can’t run very far in this world without some nosy bastard recognising me so we’ve decided to switch universes completely. Hey, it’ll be a gas to act in films but I’m aiming for us to get there more or less at the end so neither of us has to do much, after all, Severus doesn’t really look like the actor portraying him. Still, then we can live on your millions as you can live off mine.

Good luck with getting Voldemort but Severus and I have really had enough. I’m nothing but a guided missile kept in it’s silo and Severus is the boot-scraper for both sides, shat on royally from all angles.

FYI: we are using, or should that be abusing, the time-turner we nicked from Minerva McGonagall.

We want a life. Nothing dramatic, just a life. With a few quid and each other. I’m sorry, (if this is Daniel Radcliffe reading this letter, or even Alan Rickman) we didn’t even get to see your films. It was all about triangulating two time streams until they matched then sort of Summoning you to ours and apparating through the tiny time-hole to yours. There were spells and hexes on the products of the witch’s imagination but not on the places where you filmed. I’ve seen your trailer at the base of the astronomy tower, I want to see you enter one of them together.....and when you do, that is when we will act.

Enjoy being us,

Harry J Potter

Dan felt his throat start to close before he could scream. This was no accident. They had been brought here deliberately, using some very dark magic, so that Severus and Harry could really run away into a non-magical world, “And spend my fucking money”, he spat softly. He was tempted to put the letter to the flame but decided against that however rash he felt, but scuttled over to the bed and woke Alan instead.

Alan raked a hand through his hair as he read, then threw the missive to the bed, his eyes staring off unseeing, “Bastards”, was his only comment.

Dan sighed and threaded his arms around Alan’s naked chest and back, he kissed a shoulder, “Well, so far, we have the better end of the deal. We’re alive, for a start and they’re not, they didn’t factor in a fucking big chunk of rock. I can’t help wondering if the release of magic was actually the cause of the rock fall seeing as it’s left electricity here in this world. Maybe the effects were bigger than they expected”.

Alan half-turned over his shoulder, “Speaking of technology, shall we see if BT have delivered yet?” Dan grinned, not at all sleepy, “Don’t you want to crash out again?”, he asked, kissing the bare shoulder again and felt rather than saw Alan shake his head, “No, I’m wide awake owing to some berk waking me in a panic”. Dan huffed, “Sod off, it was a bit fucking creepy to find a letter actually aimed at me in a damned trunk belonging to a girl in a school of witchcraft and wizardry”.

By the low light, Alan turned enough to see Dan’s pale face and threw his long arms around him, “Sorry, I’m a bit grumpy from being woken at this time of night. Sorry, love, that must have been a shock discovering this was done to us deliberately although we were starting to suspect it. Come on, let me up and get dressed. Let’s go and see if we have the Internet yet”.

They both loved the castle in the dead of night, even the ghosts didn’t seem to be abroad this late, and they took their time making their way to the Astronomy tower. Dan had his small backpack slung on his back. They made their way to the first floor straight away and Dan knelt before the window, using the moonlight to unpack his bag by.

He laid out a phone handset and cable plus a connector and his pliers in case he needed to make modifications and set to work. Alan slipped off to the room downstairs with the computer batteries to where a line of chargers sat. He swapped out the charged ones and slipped in the dead ones, placing the still-warm batteries in different pockets so they didn’t short each other out. He took a few minutes doing this and was on the stairs, going back to Dan when he heard a familiar sound that stopped him in his tracks. The sound of a phone ringing. He dashed into the room to see an ecstatic Dan holding up his mobile on which he’d just rung the new landline before his thumb pressed the little red button to cancel the call and the sound ceased.

Alan hugged his lover, “Well?”, he intoned in his dark voice. Dan shook his head, “Nah, broadband’ll be another couple of days yet, I just called them. But we’ve got the landline in and it works”. They held each other tight for a moment then trekked back across the castle. Along the way they dipped into the castle kitchens having found them quite by accident along their way. Dan smiled as he saw the picture and tickled the pear. The door creaked slowly open.

They lit their wand-tips and ventured in only to be flooded with bright light a moment later that made them both fling an arm over their faces. It was Dobby’s voice that Dan heard first, “Is there anything (yawn) that Mr Dan wants? You should just be calling me, sirs instead of waking up the whole kitchen”.

Dan heard the admonition in the elf’s tone, “Sorry, Dobby, I thought if we came ourselves we could just make a snack without disturbing you guys at all. It doesn’t matter. Wow, I never thought you guys lived in here”, Dan cast his eyes round the huge kitchen. Dobby rolled his huge eyes, “We doesn’t, Mr Potter, we has a wing to ourselves. Very nice, too, but the kitchen has our wards on it and the elveses all want to serve Harry Potter and Professor Snape, sirs”. He had his back to his kind and glared at them significantly.

With a tiny nod, Dan got what the elf was trying to convey and said, “Lovely. I’d like a meat feast pizza, please, and Al-er, Severus, what will you have?” Without missing a beat, Alan said, “Oh, a chicken korma please, with pilau rice, if you can do Indian food”. Dobby grinned wide enough to almost split his face, “Yes we can, of course, sir, this is one of your favourites after all, for midnight feasts with Mr Harry, sirs, as is Mr Harry’s pizza. The elveses is making your suppers now. Would you like your usual firewhiskies with that?”

Taking the hint, Dan nodded, “Yes please”, and within seconds they were served drinks and piping hot, fresh food. Ravenous, they dug in, the elves leaving them alone, and, once the meal was being eaten, most melted away leaving just a couple in attendance.

Alan groaned in delight at his food and said to Dan out of the corner of his mouth, “The food’s bloody great. How’s yours?” Dan grinned then took another enormous bite, “Brilliant”, he managed before chomping down. The food was simple, excellent and cooked just for them. They ate every mouthful and thanked the house-elves profusely as they left. Dobby yawned and pressed the opened bottle of firewhisky into their hands and wished them goodnight.

Dan commented on the willingness of house-elves to rally round and cook at ridiculous hours of the night then drifted to the food, “How weird was that? I had no idea that chicken korma was Snape’s favourite grub, did you?” Alan shook his head, smiling and full, “No, nor yet that pizza was Harry’s. It is rather odd, I’ll admit, but the hour is late and I want more sleep, preferably this time with you in my arms”. Dan couldn’t resist an invitation like that and within minutes he was drifting off, safely wrapped up by his lover.

****

Albus was joyful as he passed the news on to Remus at the breakfast table the next day. “They love even the same food, Remus, they are so alike”. Remus shook his head. He thought that the old man was finally starting to come apart, as if he couldn’t really admit to himself the loss of his two most valued warriors as well as two surrogate sons. Remus bit his lip and wondered when he’d have to forcibly take the headship from this amazing old man and give it to someone with all of their marbles.

The Two did not appear at the breakfast table.

Nor lunch.

They were late to dinner and were sullen and angry with each other and barely civil to the others. Dan left first, alone, his fists clenched at his sides and his back bowed, his head bent. All eyes but Alan’s followed him. When the headmaster made a tentative enquiry, the man almost bit his head off, flashed him a glare and went back to his food. Albus sighed, how like Severus, to still eat in the midst of so much tension whilst Dan had rushed off, his meal barely touched – so like Harry. Whatever this row had been about, it looked like more than a mere lover’s tiff. Eventually Alan stood, nodded curtly at the assembled company and strode off after tossing his napkin onto his plate.

Dan seethed and paced at the top of the astronomy tower. How could Alan be so damned calm in the face of all this? Dan felt cheated, brought here on a whim to be sacrificed because the fucking hero was tired?!!! And how? By being watched, observed – stalked. There should be someone to sue over all this. They had the letter and he was pretty sure it was authentic, as well as the spells and everything. They even had hair. An early skim through the lengthy procedure had mentioned using polyjuice for the beginning of the ritual.

He felt raped, violated and Alan didn’t seem to get this at all, or seemed to accept it with grace and this angered Dan more and more, he felt ready to implode. He’d been set-up, played, conned and he wanted to hurt them, badly, only he wouldn’t even get that satisfaction, they were dead. That stopped him mid-pace.

It had all gone wrong, hadn’t it? Terribly wrong. What was so bad about their situation that they risked everything to disappear so completely into a universe where their doings were entirely fictional? Dan supposed they had more research coming up and sighed, his anger evaporating for now. He furrowed his brow and thought. Why go through all that? What the hell did it all mean?

He leaned on the parapet and looked out at the dusk, chewing his lip in concentration deep in thought but started and turned at a sound behind him, his wand drawn reflexively. He breathed out and relaxed when he made out Alan silhouetted in the doorway.

Holding both hands palms up and out, Alan approached, grinning, “Whoa there, fast draw, by the way”. Dan smiled and leaned back against the wall draping his arms out along the low stone cill, dangling his wand insolently from his fingers, “Come here and kiss me and let me say I’m sorry for being such a prat”, Dan murmured.

Alan stepped close, took Dan’s face between his large hands and kissed him hard until Dan had an arm around his neck and a leg wrapped around his hip. They parted slightly and gasped softly at each other, smiling lustfully, then Alan said, “You were angry, not a prat, although I think we’ll have to apologise to the rest of the staff for carrying our business into the school. I sort of suspected that Severus Snape and Harry Potter had either done this accidentally or deliberately and the more I’ve thought about it, the more the margin for accident narrows”.

Dan nodded, “Yeah, we were chosen, selected. I wonder if anything actually pushed us together to begin with, you know? It throws the whole beginnings of ‘us’ into doubt, don’t you think?” Alan’s look of alarm startled Dan but he stayed silent, letting the older man sort his scattered wits then Alan shook his head, “No. I cannot believe that, Dan. I’d....er....admired you from afar for many years. You handled your real-world fame with aplomb and excellent grace. I would observe you with the younger cast, especially those who had been chosen from competitions and the like, those who had never acted before, certainly not at any level above their school nativity play. I recall your generosity when others of your stage school ilk rather looked down on them and the way that you would make them comfortable to be on the same stage as yourself. From the little I know of the ‘real’ Harry Potter, I would say that you actually exhibit more of his perceived traits of big-heartedness and generosity than he does. No, I needed no inducements to fall in love with you, Dan”.

Reassured, Dan blinked and let out a long breath he wasn’t aware he’d been holding, then smiled, “I’m glad of that, Alan. I don’t think I could stand that somehow me and you are false, if that makes any sense?” Alan leaned down and kissed him again, “It does. Garbled, but yes, it’s own kind of sense, but what of your own attraction to myself? As I was, I was three times your age. Now, I know you had a .....shall we call it.....a fixation on the older man, but why me?”

Dan thought a moment then let his eyes rest on Alan’s. Not boring or penetrating but just looking into his lover’s dark eyes. “At first it was your intensity and of course ‘the voice’, famous the acting world over. You’re an actor’s actor, always well prepared, with tons of different ways to do each take, a real film actor. Where some could only offer slight variations in their perception of character, you can turn yours around within the parameters of a single conversation. You are arresting and magnetic to watch and listen to.

I’ve admired your career for years, yes, sneer if you must, but even as a young kid watching Die Hard, I loved you as the silky-voiced villain. Then....and then I get the chance to act with you. Wow, you were so good to me in all those scenes when I was a kid but you challenged me as I got older and between us, our scenes snap and sparkle, especially where we argue, there’s almost a sexual tension there. Well, if you must know, there was in my case. I’ve fancied you since the fifth film but you were always less approachable. Now I realise that it was just you staying in character. That day you kissed me twice. Wow. I just wanted you to bend me over the balustrading and fuck me then and there. I couldn’t think straight and then when you told me, ‘later and with costumes on’, I nearly came on the spot. That, to me, was real. All the nerves, the way my blood fucking sang in my veins waiting for that scene to be over so I could go back to your trailer. I was on fucking fire for you and I don’t want it to have been some fucking poxy spell, okay? I really wanted you. I still want you and I love you. I want all of that to be real”.

They kissed again, long and slow, then parted slightly again. Alan wiped the small tears from Dan’s cheeks and said, softly, “Then it is real, love, to us, for us. It is real and always will be, whatever happens to us from now on, I know that I love and am loved in return, we have been loved by others and we continue to be capable of love. Our hearts are still our own, Dan, my love, as are our souls. I fell in love with ‘Dan’, not ‘Harry’, and you fell in love with me, Alan, not ‘Severus’. Whatever the evil we may have to face, my Danny, we still have love on our side, and, soppy though that sentiment may seem in the midst of a war, I find it strangely comforting, don’t you?”

Dan shrugged, “Dunno about comforting but it takes the sting out a bit. That and the fact that you are ‘Alan’ and I am ‘Dan’ on this side. I wonder if the magic transference was intentional?” Alan held Dan tighter and nodded, “How else would we stand a chance? I suspect that all will be revealed when we examine the contents of the trunk. Now, you are shivering and the night is cold. Let us go back to the warmth of a fire and a hot drink”. Dan smiled and unwrapped himself from about his beloved and let himself be guided away, a strong arm around him as well as a cloak for warmth.

He hid his smile later as Alan fussed over him, chafing his cold feet, tucking him in and feeding him hot chocolate. This was just one of the many reasons he fell for older men. Sometimes he needed to be ‘mothered’. He let his smile out later, however, when Alan joined him in bed, spooned him from behind and held him close against his own body’s furnace. Dan was asleep in minutes, adrift in the comfort of long arms, with Alan’s mouth pressed into his crown and a firm body plastered along his back.

They stood shaving with their wands side by side the following morning and discussed what, if anything, they should tell of what Harry and Severus had really done. Dan murmured, “They may even turn against Harry and Severus. I want to help, I really do, but I wonder how much use we’ll really be to them”. Alan rinsed his wand before starting on the other side of his face, “They have to keep us for now. You are the creature of the prophecy and it is to you that the final moment will come, however well disguised. Both sides probably want us dead, at the decisive moment, we will have to act, and really fucking mean it”.

Dan smoothed a hand over his newly shaved chin and tilted his head this way and that, checking for missed bits, “I know. That’s the sad bit. How to persuade the others that we are worth keeping alive”. His tone was so sombre, that Alan put his wand down carefully and moved beside his lover, easing his long arms around him. He nuzzled into Dan’s neck until Dan moved his head to allow him access, then Alan spoke softly, right by Dan’s ear, “We become good at the shared spell-casting. If one of us’s magic isn’t strong enough to do the final deed, then we use our combined energy to do it. We’re wizards, Danny, it’s about time we thought like it”.

Dan shook his head, “Behave. We’re muggles playing at magic. We hardly know anything save a few spells that we’ve been taught or we’ve taught ourselves, we simply haven’t been here long enough to really fit in. Come on, we’re hidden away like the dirty secret that we are. There’s no need to tell Dumbledore of the fact that Harry and Severus had a plot. Oh, no, he’ll have already sussed that one out, only the stupid bugger thought it was a plan to kill old Voldie and he was wrong. Wrong! They were secretive and sneaky and they got out but at what cost? Now we have to do their bloody job and have to cling to Dumbledore’s bloody coat-tails”.

Alan flung his hands out to the sides in entreaty, “Dan, look at us. We can do magic. We have magic inside us now, trammelling it is just a matter of education. Maybe we don’t have time to learn much before the War hots up but afterwards I want to get into what we have; explore it a bit. Don’t you?”

Looking a bit helpless, Dan shrugged, “I dunno. I keep thinking that all this will go away the moment I cast that ‘Avada’. I like having magic, okay? It’s cool beyond anything, but I can’t help thinking that we’re not going to survive this and that rather casts a cloud. I’m wracking my brains for a means to stay alive, by blackmail if by no other means and I feel we need a handle here, something we can hold over the damned headmaster so the Order troops look after us rather than feed us to the wolves, or whatever”.

Alan gently suggested, “Maybe we should show him just what we can do together, get him involved in our training more. We don’t have to show him the secret space. I’m not sure, convince them that we’re worth, a) training further, and b) keeping alive as a more valuable asset than they realised”.

Chewing his lip, Dan looked into his lover’s eyes, “I still don’t trust him”, he said. Alan made a dismissive gesture, “I think he’s used to not being trusted, first by them and now by us. They knew they were his tools just as we do. Now we need to find that story so we have the upper hand as to how we, as tools, are to be used and show the headmaster just what precious tools he has in his toolbox. We aren’t helpless, Danny, we’ve learned such a lot. Now perhaps, it is time to reveal what we know”.

Dan capitulated with a grin, pulling Alan’s head back down to his and kissing him, “But only our magic and the basics on the experiment, okay? Nothing about the papers yet?”, he said after another kiss that left them short of both sense and breath. Alan agreed with a nod. It was all he could manage right now and he lost himself in the kisses and erotic attentions of a man half his age.

****

The next morning they walked hand-in-hand into the great Hall for breakfast. Poppy smiled to see the emnity of the previous night gone. The two men sat and ate making their customary small talk and the atmosphere around the table was relaxed until Dan, rummaging in his hastily thrown-on robes, produced a copy of the letter and fired it across the table at the headmaster. “Here, Albus, take a look at this. This is a copy. I still hold the original”, then they watched as the man read, pushing his half-moon glasses up his nose and tilting the letter to the light.

Remus flickered nervous glances between Dan, Alan and Albus, wondering what was going on. What the hell was in that letter that was making Albus sway even in his seat and look up sharply, his eyes wide, “I knew nothing of this”, he hissed, “They were fighting for us. They were doing research and then they disappeared. There is no trace of them save you two and two buried men in your universe. I knew nothing of this”, they were all a bit shocked at Albus’ stunned whispers.

But Dan shrugged in the face of it, “Sorry, but they’ve gone. Run away. You can imagine what it was like to actually see that letter for the first time, and, no, we will not be sharing the contents of the trunk yet, not until I’ve uploaded them and stored them online, then they’re all yours”. The others all looked baffled at the techno-speak but Dan carefully tweezed the letter from Albus’ hand and passed it to the others in order that they be brought up to speed. Minerva reacted immediately to seeing Harry’s messy handwriting again. Both her and the werewolf knew that for all the cruelty, Harry was the author beyond doubt.

They were all stunned and somewhat horrified at the defection of their golden boy leaving these poor innocents behind in their stead. Soon there were raised voices aplenty complaining of their plight. Remus instantly requested that a copy be made available for the Order. Dan produced one and handed it to him. “I think it’s good that people realise that this isn’t our fault”, he said, “We didn’t ever plan on coming here. We were just going to accept the life that being an actor throws at you. Now we’re here. Now we’re together. Now we’re expected to be heroes. So teach us. Let us show you what we already know. Teach us potions and Defence but do not discard us for if you do, retribution awaits. I will not detail it as of now, but just be warned, we have the original editions of all Harry and Severus’ writings and we will put them on general release if we are allowed to die”.

Dumbledore’s look was quite stern over his glasses, “There is no need to threaten us to ensure your own welfare, gentlemen”. Dan glowered, “How else, then are we to ensure it? Right now all we are to you is an inconvenience, an embarassment, an impediment but we are all you’ve got. Your friends are dead. We were saved by a medical technology that muggle medicine just does not have. Also, there was no-one looking for us. Alan didn’t have to be onset for a few hours and I had finished for a couple of weeks until pick-ups. There was a storm, I remember it clearly and everyone else was indoors ‘cos it was chucking it down. No-one would have even thought to look for us – them – for a while.

I know we are needed for your final showdown, we are cognisant of many aspects of your culture and this current situation, i.e., the prophecy and the whole Voldemort thing but what then? Then we are more of a liability than anything else. Alan doesn’t even look like Severus, he’d only pass at a distance. What will you do with us then? We can’t attend your galas and balls, we won’t pass at close quarters, so, what then?”

Dumbledore’s beard hid his nervous swallow. Of course, these two were intelligent men. He shouldn’t feel so surprised that they had divined the prevailing mood amongst the Order so adroitly but he did and at that moment, he also realised that he had severely underestimated these two. Perhaps they did have something to offer after all. He cleared his throat, “Well, gentlemen, you have put forth a convincing case for your survival and you, Dan, have mentioned that the two of you have come on in leaps and bounds vis-a-vis your magical capabilities; you have even......threatened to reveal them to us. Would you care to demonstrate? Here? Now?” The gauntlet was thrown down and the old man was smirking, most of it hidden by beard, as the two rose and made their way to an empty patch of floor.

Before they stopped and turned, Remus leapt to his feet and threw jinx after hex at them. In almost slow motion, Dan and Alan pivoted on the same foot, Alan caught Dan to his chest, his hand slid down Dan’s forearm so both hands were on Dan’s wand and the counter spells made both jinx and hex fizzle to nought in mid-air, dropping to the floor and dissipating amongst a shower of coloured sparks.

Remus made a comic moment of staring at the tip of his wand for a moment then at the patch of ground where his spells had expired then up at the two. “Bloody hell, your reaction times are pretty fast, gentlemen”, Minerva McGonagall’s brogue shattered the weighty silence. Poppy’s chuckle was plainly heard.

Albus tipped his head, “That was pretty impressive boys. Remus. To their left”, he barked and stood himself, circling to their right. He wanted to see individual wandwork though he had to admit that the shared spell-casting was a bit new to him and very interesting.

He got Alan and loosed off a couple of nasty hexes at the man that were countered easily, then he was caught by an itching jinx to his scalp that was bloody annoying. Where had the man learned to aim for the head? He found he was really having to keep his wits about him as he duelled this man. Had this man been a professional fighter of some kind? He certainly fought like one.

As for Remus, he called a truce after ten of the most intense minutes of fighting he had ever done and was now leaning over, his hands on his knees, getting his breath back. “You guys have really come on and you’re bloody fit, the pair of you. You fight well and you have each other’s backs, a real unit of two. Albus, we really have misjudged these two”, he called out between gasps.

Albus mopped his brow with his hanky, “I think that you might be right, Remus. These two can lead a merry dance. I see that you are trained fighters and for beginners, your magic levels are stunning. How is this?” Dan ruefully admitted, “I think their magic sort of rubbed off on us as the transfer happened and we sort of know lots of the spells anyway as the, er, witch who wrote the books had a lot of input onset when we did the magic bits. I think we surprised Hermione a bit by how well-versed we already were in wand-craft”.

Alan interjected, “Physical fitness is part of every actor’s life. The body is our vehicle of expression, so we can move as well, a must for when one is doing action movies, the actors all have to be very fit. Added to that, over the years, many actors are schooled quite intensely in many of the fighting disciplines in order to project with more verisimilitude either on stage or on screen. If the fighting looks all wrong then someone with more time on their hands than perhaps they should have will write in and complain in meticulous detail just where we went wrong, incorrect moves and so on”.

Dan and Alan looked up at the sound of applause, the drug of choice for many an actor, and instinctively bowed. The ladies had seemed quite taken with their performance and were expressing their appreciation. Albus and Remus, sweaty and red, joined in. They looked at each other, smirked, linked arms and bowed again deeply then exited stage left with the heady sound of eight hands clapping following them out of the Hall,

“Well”, Remus sat back down and sipped water, “That was a sight to see, wasn’t it? As you say, Albus, they’ve really come on. Now all we have to do is persuade the rest of the Order”. Poppy smiled, “I think we ask them to give another demonstration like that one, only this time, begging your pardons, sirs, but this time with more worthy opponents, shut Wakefield up for a start, in fact I suggest you match him with Alan with maybe Tonks to Dan”.

Albus regarded the medic thoughtfully, “You may just have a point there, my dear, you may just have a point. Remus, when did they start joint spell-casting? Of all the abilities they displayed tonight, that was the one that intrigued me the most. I do not recall our dearly departed friends ever displaying such a talent, do you?”

Remus wracked his brains, “No. I don’t recall ever seeing them cast together like that. Maybe it’s a way they’ve devised to make them strong in their weaker places, I believe power can be shared like that under certain circumstances”. Albus nodded absentmindedly, still deep in thought, “Certain circumstances......yes.....Remus, suppose, just for a moment, that we have two bondees under our roof. That would make their case stronger, do you not think?”

Remus rolled his eyes and cut a sidelong glance at the old man. Albus was so far in denial he was off into equatorial Africa! “Albus, it is a much more common thing for two almost squibs to do to amplify what little magic they have and see how exhausted they were after the session”.

Albus twinkled annoyingly, “Ah, yes, but the buggers wiped us out in single combat, didn’t they?” Remus conceded, “All right, tired us out but hardly killed us”. Albus whipped his head around, “Good lord, man. You don’t expect they’d have let loose with Unforgiveables, now, do you?” Remus shrugged, “I sort of expected them to maybe try one....”

“Good grief Remus. They are dependent on us here, do you think that they would bite the hand that feeds them? Not only that, but they are good men, even if they are being a bit devious with us. They can’t even trust us to protect them and I can’t blame them, given some of the current mood amongst the Order. And, for your information, I think that Poppy is right, it is about time the Order met our young surrogates, got to know them as people rather than expendable nuisances. I also think I need them to hear that abominable letter from Harry, I want them to know whom they’ve been lionising all these years”.

Remus rounded on the old man, “No!. I won’t have you treating Harry and Severus as if they’re cowards! They were at the end of their rope! They’ve been tired for years! I don’t mean the aaah-yawn-had-a-busy-day kind of tired, I mean the up-night-after-night-with-no-respite- type. They were exhausted, soul-weary and had had enough of all the shit we expected them to handle and do. The pressure on them was almost constant. How many times had Poppy had to nurse Severus through Cruciatus after-shock in the months leading up to them going? Even if Harry had managed to kill Voldemort, he wouldn’t have had Severus to be with at this rate, even if he had survived himself. I hate too that they’ve wet out on us, Albus, but I don’t blame them for going, if that makes any sense?”, he wound down.

Albus sighed, “I know, Remus, I know. Of course they weren’t cowards, they had fought so bravely and for so long......no, I don’t blame them either, s’just a shame what happened to them is all.....such a bloody waste, Remus, such a bloody waste”, and with that, the old man gave in to hopeless tears, Remus pulling him against his chest and holding him for a while until Poppy came up and led Albus gently away, murmuring in his ear.

Minerva poured Remus a strong whisky and led the man to a chair, “I’m worried about him, Remus. Am I worrying unnecessarily?” Remus met her troubled eyes and shook his head, “Min, I wonder myself just how long he can go on. It’s not the first time I’ve wondered about staging an intervention, relieving him of his post, but it’s hard. Albus is as much a part of this place as the stones themselves”.

Minerva sat beside him and patted his hand, “Aye, laddie but people come and go while the rocks remain”. He smiled faintly at what he was sure was a quotation but for the life of him he couldn’t recall it’s provenance. Maybe she was right. Maybe it was time for a new leader for the school. He let his head drop back against the back of the chair and his eyes closed. He was so damned tired......

****

Dan lay on his back and gazed up at the canopy. His body felt heavy and tired but his mind wouldn’t let him drift off. Beside him, Alan moaned n his sleep and shifted closer to Dan, squashing his face in Dan’s side in a way that made Dan smile. Alan was a cuddler in his sleep and Dan had never been with a cuddler before, always used to having his own side of the bed. He rather liked it but it meant being crushed or squashed on a fairly regular basis as Alan was both heavier and bigger than him.

After a gentle tussle to reclaim his limbs, Dan slid out of bed and into his clothes. At breakfast today, he’d received his first owl making everyone curious as to what it contained. He waved a disc in their general direction, “Just some software”, he said, but it wasn’t just software at all.

He knelt back on the bed and looked down at his lover sleeping. He pulled the duvet up and cleared Alan’s face of tangled hair then kissed the slack lips through which breaths whistled. “I love you, my Alan, and if you were the marrying kind, you git, I’d bloody marry you. I think I’d make you a lovely wife. Just gonna see if the broadband is on, yet, and I need a walk, I can’t sleep. I’ll leave you a note”, all said in the softest whisper as he ghosted his mouth over his beloved’s face.

He scribbled a ‘Post-it’ and stuck it to the fireplace. Alan’d see that easily enough, the fluorescent pink rather showed up against the blackened stone mantel then hastily packed his laptop bag and headed out quietly fro the astronomy tower. Alan rolled over in bed and mumbled, “Doan’ min’ tha’, Dan. ‘ll marry yer”, but Dan wasn’t there to hear. Alan rolled again and was asleep in seconds, his face buried in Dan’s pillow.

Dan paused on the stairs to the first floor of the astronomy tower and smiled hearing music. He hoped young Lydia was practicing her little head off at her ballet, then pressed on into the room. In seconds, he had a fire going and his laptop plugged in on the long extension cord that ran between the floors, the irony of the situation was.....they had electricity on one floor and the phone on another. Still, they managed where they could.

He booted up his machine and configured a small crate to stand it on while he sat on the floor. He plugged in all the bits and bobs, the modem and the signal splitter for the broadband and phone. Once his main screen was showing, he inserted the disc and installed the stuff, he pressed ‘web/home’ and waited with his fingers crossed. He peered at the ‘cannot find server’ page and scowled at the screen, perhaps he needed a re-boot.

Once he was up and running again, he pressed ‘web/home’ on his keyboard again and grinned like a loony when the Tiscali site scrolled down. “Yessss”, he punched the air. He was online.

His mood was soon darkened, however. He went to his email account to find it terminated, then he went to a friend’s website and typed in his name. Oh god, there were pages and pages of obituaries. Tearfully composed poems from friends, drunkenly composed in the wee small hours as the tragedy hit, films of the funeral corteges as they split in the centre of London. Footage from YouTube showing young fans signing books of condolence in full Gryffindor quidditch colours....

Dan shrank from the images. He had no idea so much had been going on since his so-called death. Only it wasn’t his: it was the real Harry Potter’s and Severus Snape’s. He suddenly felt small and useless. He watched, his knees gathered to his chin, as a nation mourned them, him, them, as many in Slytherin colours with fake noses hooked downwards as Alan’s had never done as there were in Gryffindor garb.

The enormity of it hit him and he sobbed alone in the round room, the fire sputtering merrily. He wanted Alan with him. He wanted Alan to see this. He just plain wanted Alan to be here right now, and he sobbed into his folded arms as more images played onscreen.

And there he was, rushing into the room and taking the dejected Dan into his arms. “Dan. Stop it. Don’t cry. I love you”, was murmured in the younger man’s ears and he came back from the nightmare consuming him and sobbed in his beloved’s arms, confident at last that he could really trust the man......especially when Alan said, “I worry about you. I just want to be there if you need me”, and Dan needed him.

Alan watched some of the footage as he calmed Dan down in his arms, their funeral playing once again with the attendant images of weeping fans wearing ties and scarves and other Hogwarts ephemera, bits from their second to last film, now on general release then a teaser from the final movie – the very scene they had been shooting after which.....Alan found it strange that this scene was the trailer. It wasn’t that exciting, it didn’t promise further CGI trickery to come, but it did contain the two of them, shouting at each other.

The comments posted beneath were full of tears but also full of love for the ‘argumentative but undeniably cute’ pair. One read, “I wish they’d sort their differences out then kiss and make up. We love happy endings, don’t we, girls?” There were the hopeful all across the Internet. Dan grinned and wiped his tears away, “I love happy endings, too, ladies”, he murmured as he turned in Alan’s startled arms.

“So, what exactly were you looking at, love, that made you feel bad enough to dig me out of bed?” Dan was quite surprised at the way Alan had couched the question. “Dug you out of bed? I came nowhere near you”, he replied. Alan shrugged and shook his head, “I felt you in my head. You needed me. You were here. I came. I cannot say clearer than that, it was like a call”. Dan hugged him and shrugged, “I’m glad you’re here. I was finding this hard”, he waved a hand at the screen as footage from their funeral played again.

Alan leaned forward and moused over the ‘x’, closing the browser down, “That’s enough for one night, I think. All right, it works, that much we know. Now we need to find the story that we are in but I think that task can wait another day. You look fatigued, my love, and I want to take you back to bed, where you should be right now, lying curled up in my arms”. A spectacular kiss followed this and Dan closed his computer down, tucked it in his bag and allowed Alan to lead him back to their rooms by the hand.

Alan was right. Dan was knackered. He shrugged off his clothes, washed and cleaned his teeth then settled in the arms of his lover. Somehow he registered that this was the first time they had been to bed without making love but he was so tired he found it hard to care. Did it count that they had gone to bed together earlier? And had made love? It was such inane questions buzzing round his head that finally sent Dan over the edge. When Alan finally heard the regular breaths, he gathered Dan close, sunk his own face into Dan’s hair and followed him into sleep.