Cooking Up Love ---- COMPLETED

Talk?? I Didn't feel like talking. I felt like ripping off his clothes and having him for a post-breakfast snack. "Lets talk later." I said moving closer to him and kissing his neck. I was surprised to feel him pushing me away.

"Not right now Frank. We need to sort some stuff out and I can think straight when you are that close to me. I was starting to get angry. How dare he push me away. What an asshole! I was about to stand up and yell at him, I guess he could tell what I was thinkincauscause he gave me a look that said I should sit there and shut up.

"Frank, I know you feel like you can't trust me. But I promise you, I have changed. Even if I wanted to cheat on you I couldn't. You are the only thing I think about night and day. Please come home with me and be my girlfriend." He stared intently into my eyes while he made his speech. I wanted to believe him, my heart was telling me to trust him. Shit every part of my body was telling me to trust him, pt Ipt I couldn't.

"I'm sorry Robbie, I can't. I am afraid." I told him with tears welling up in my eyes.

"Frank, I'm afraid too. Thats what happens when people are in love. The feel incredilbe joy but they also feel scared. Don't let your fear control your life. Please." I almost crumbled then, he sounded so frantic he was almost begging.

"I'm not ready to leave Greece," was all I said. He stood up and walked to the bridge, I could see his shoulders shaking and I knew he was crying. I felt like such a bitch to do that to him. How could I make the man I loved so much cry like that.

"Let me know if you change your mind Frank." Then I realized that I had broken his heart, I had been so busy protecting myself that I had deeply wounded him. I began to cry too. That was the last time I saw him. I think he packed his stuff and left before I even got up off the pillow I was sitting on.

I laid in my bed for four days, not showering or eating or even brushing my teeth. I analyzed my decision over and over again. I realized I had been a fool, I had the opprotunity to be with a man who loved me. What more could I ask for? I had been so busy worring that people would think I was using him or that he would cheat on me. I hadn't seen how much time I had wasted. It was late in the evening on the fourth day when I got up and went to the kitchen. I made a huge dinner, ate it all and then got a shower. I called Mr. Karathanakis told him I was leaving and made arrangements to pay the remander of the rent. I then called the airlines and booked a flight back to the States. My plane was leaving at 6:00 am the next morning. I had slept so much during the past few days that I had trouble going to sleep now. So I sat at my computer and began to write. I wrote all night untill it was time to leave for the airport. I made a quick stop at the market to say good bye to Mr. & Mrs. Naskos. I would miss them, they were so sweet. I promised to come back soon and I meant it. On the plane I tried to close my eyes and sleep, but I kept wondering if it was too late. Would he forgive me?

My plane landed in New York and I had to catch a connecting flight to L.A. I had an hour to wit between them so I called my mom. I knew she would tell me if I was doing the right thing. She gave me shit for about 10 minutes, telling me I was a terrible person to do that to Robbie, nothing I hadn't already called myself. After we hung up I tried to call Stella, but there was no answer, I didn't leave a message on her machine. Then I heard the call to board the plane. I was just a few hours from L.A. and from Robbie. I had a tight ball of tension in my stomach. What would he say? The flight seemed to take forever but before I knew it I was standing in the warm L.A. sun with my bags hailing a taxi. The ball in my stomach was getting bigger and tighter the closer I got to Robbie's. I was almost crying because I was so nervous. The security stopped us at the driveway, he looked at mth sth some surprise and waved us up towards the house. The driver unloaded my bags, I paid him and he left. I left my bags on the ground and walked up to the front door. I had never entered the house that way. It was actually really scary. A big wooden door with brass door knockers like in "A Christmas Carol" I expected Jacob Marley to start moaning at me. I took a deep breath and rang the door bell. After several moments the door swung open and Robbie was standing there.

"Frank....?"