Something special

Stefan could not help stare at his friend when Neil opened the door to his Fulham flat.
“My God, what happened?” the boy asked. Neil looked tiered, his eyes behind his glasses were red and slightly bloated and there were dark rings underneath them.
“I’m okay, don’t worry,” he replied and guided the boy to the living room, where he sat down on the sofa.
“I was just having a cup of coffee. Do you want one as well?”
“No, thanks. I just had breakfast with Ian. I’m stuffed for the rest of the day.” Stefan told him and sat down next to him on the sofa.
“Oh, yes. I forgot,” Neil admitted. “How did it go?”
“Fine. But tell me what happened. You look horrible.”
“Thank you so much!” Neil smiled weakly and put his cup back on the table.
“I quit with Dean yesterday. And he did not take it very well. It… It was awful, really.” He closed his eyes and forced the images from his mind. Stefan moved closer to him and took his hand in his. Neil looked at the boy and at their entwined hands in wonder. Why was it that he felt so much better just because this boy was sitting next to him? That he felt he had done the right thing even though Stefan had not said or done anything? It was amazing; the strain was melting away and everything that had bothered him just a moment ago did not seem to be so bad after all. He squeezed Stefan’s hand and continued:
“We had a bad fight. I said things I shouldn’t have said. He slapped me. I practically dragged him out of the flat. Thankfully Chris dropped in – quite a coincidence, that - and Dean left before we were literally at each other’s throats.”
He had not quite finished when he found himself surrounded by Stefan’s arms.
The boy was hugging him tightly, covering his face with tiny kisses.
“Poor one,” the boy muttered. “But now you’re mine. And I won’t be horrible to you. Or slap you or betray you or something.”
“I know, I know,” Neil whispered back, returning the embrace, burying his face in the boy’s soft hair. He kissed the smooth skin of Stefan’s throat and felt the boy shudder slightly in his arms. “I love you.”
They held each other tight for a while but Neil finally broke the hug.
“What did you actually want to discuss with Ian?” he asked.
“Oh, that,” Stefan sighed. “I guess I made a fuss about nothing. I even talked to Kevin before.”
When Neil did not comment on this and just looked at him, Stefan continued eventually.
“I thought you would laugh at me sooner or later because I never had a boyfriend before. I thought you… Well, you’re older and you had more relations and you surely want more than just to kiss me…”
“You thought I would put you under pressure because you… are not experienced with men?” Neil asked, eyebrows raised.
“Yes. I asked Kevin about it. About what guys do in bed and he told me all sorts of things about blowjobs and tops or bottoms and then he made me watch a sex movie. I didn’t like the guys there, they were so… I don’t know. I like you better.”
Neil laughed softly under his breath.
“You worry about things. And what does Ian have to do this that? Did you ask him for advice as well? About gay sex practices?”
“No. Yes. I mean… I didn’t discuss any details with him; Kevin told me more about it than I wanted to know. Ian just said I should talk to you.”
“Okay” Neil took the boy’s hand again and stroked it softly. “I won’t do anything that you don’t like. You can say ‘no’ anytime. Yes, I find you attractive and yes, I get tempted every now and then but I love you. I don’t want to hurt you. Just trust me, okay?”
Stefan nodded and smiled. Maybe it was not as complicated as he had feared.