I Can't Look At You Anymore

****MIKEY'S P.O.V****

I didn't expect him to react this way.

He loved me, I loved him, why was it such a bad thing to want to be near him?

I headed back into the house, towards the kitchen, I needed to occupy my mind, all I could think about was Gerard and how he wouldn't come near me. I heard the sound of the washing machine start up, I had to talk to him, make him see things my way.

I leaned in the doorway casually watching as he poured fabric softener into the machine.

"So that's why your sheets are always softer than mine..."

He flicked his gaze towards me and I saw a little window of hope for me in his eyes.

"I'm really sorry Gee, I swear though, I really didn't hear. Please, forgive me? Let me make it up to you." I took a step closer to him and then another until I was standing behind him.

I wrapped my arms around his body and cuddled him like I used to when we were kids.

To my surprise he turned around to face me.

"We have to stop this." He said kissing me fully on the lips, "This isn't normal to want this." He said pressing me against the vibrating washing machine.

He was kissing me and I was happy, his hands were touching me and I was happy. He felt the same still and he couldn't deny it. I could feel his hips grinding into mine so I ground back, feeling his moan in his throat. I fumbled at his zip.

"Boys! Are you home? Mikey? Gerard?"

Instantly Gerard stopped. He pushed my hand away and tucked himself as best he could.

"Hey Gran. I'm coming!" And with that he left me standing alone.

I stormed out after him but stopped on seeing her. Gran had brought a girl back with her, she was introducing her to Gerard.

I grabbed the cordless and headed out the back, I dialed franks number.

"Hello?"

"Hey, are your parent's home?" I asked in a frustrated tone.

"No, you wanna come over?"

"I'll be there in 10." I hung up the phone grabbed my wallet, keys and phone and headed out to my car.

"Hey! Are you..." I slammed frank against the wall kicking the door closed on my way in. I jammed my tongue down his throat in order to stop the small talk.

He went to touch me but I grabbed his hand with a vice like grip and pushed it too against the wall, he winced in pain but I didn't care, this was about my pain, not his.

My kisses were savage on his lips, so savage that I tasted his blood in my mouth.

I tugged furiously at his jeans that hugged his thighs,

just like Gerard's, finally I worked the button free, and the rest was child's play.

I pulled him off the wall and moved him to the laundry, he didn't object, but I doubt I would have listened anyway.

I bent him over the washing machine

just like what I wanted to do to Gerard...

I forced his legs open wider, then unzipped my own pants dropping them just enough.

I pushed my way into him, I heard him cry out, just like Gerard did...

But I didn't slow or stop, I thrust harder and faster, it wasn't about the sex anymore, it was about the frustration, it was about Gerard.

I kept pumping into him until I was done, until I was numb, then I pulled up my pants and left without saying a word to Frank