Playing With Fire

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Kelly stopped her jeep along side her favorite tree. She had been home for a week and a half and had done a pretty good job at avoiding Jason and Ashley. Which really wasn't all that hard to do when you lived on fifty acres of land.



It wasn't that she didn't want to see them. It was just that she hated the look that they had in their eyes whenever they looked at her. It was a mixture of pity for her and hurt that she was pulling away, and she couldn't take either one. She jumped out of the jeep and sat down, leaning against the tree's trunk. She wasn't even sure why she was acting this way. She had barely known Carrie. They had dated for a total of a few hours, yet she this was the hardest time she had ever had getting over someone.



Everything seemed to remind her of the country blonde. She couldn't even wake up in the morning without the memory of Carrie straddling her playing in her mind. Rain started to fall, mixing with her tears which, as had happened so often lately, she wasn't even sure when they had started to fall or why.



++++++++



Carrie looked at the CD shining in her lap confusedly. She searched the envelope once more and found a note card. She pulled it out and saw the words written in bold. She picked the CD up and brought it over to her stereo, pulling up a chair. She flipped the disc over. Both sides were blank, and it took her a few tries before getting it on the right side. The sound of a solitary guitar filled the room and was soon followed by the voice she had been hearing in her dreams. She looked down at the note card that was still in her hands, reading the words, "She's singing to you."



Carrie listened as Kelly sang out, her voice begging for an end to the pain. Carrie's heart was fighting against it self--beating in excitement at the sound of Kelly's voice in her ears once again, but breaking as the song filled her heart.



The song ended and the disc stopped spinning. Carrie remained seated, not bothering to wipe away the tears. She took a deep breath, steadying herself, deciding that it was time to end this once and for all. She was tired of it. She was tired of suffering; she was tired of crying, but mostly, she was tired of needing someone so much that it hurt. So...it was time.



+++++++++



"Kelly," Jason sighed, pulling up next to the tree on a four-wheeler. The sun was starting to set, and he and Ashley hadn't seen her all day.



She continued to look down in her lap.



"Come on, Kellbell," he all but begged, using his nickname for her. "Let's go inside. Ashley cooked for us."



"I'm not hungry," she replied flatly.



"You have to eat. This isn't healthy."



She went back to ignoring him.



"Kelly, please. It'll be getting dark soon, and I don't like you out here by yourself when it's dark, you know that."



Kelly looked up him. She hated making him worry, and he knew that.



"Alright," she agreed. "But I'm not eating," she informed him, walking to her jeep.



"Na, leave that here," he said. "We'll get it tomorrow."



She frowned, but listened to him, climbing behind him on the four-wheeler. Kelly wrapped her arms around her older brother, holding tight. As he took off, she pressed her face into his back, glad for the comfort. Jason clenched his jaw to hold down the lump in his throat that was rising at the feeling of the back of shirt becoming wet from his little sister's tears.



Growing up, he hadn't been there to protect her. But from the moment he entered her life again, he swore that he would always be there to shield her from everything. It killed him to find out that he couldn't protect her from everything, especially since she wouldn't let him. The fact that she was openly crying next to him hurt even worse, because he knew how much she hated to cry in front of people. So, the fact that she was, meant that whatever was going on was really bad.



He pulled up to the front of the house, bringing the four-wheeler to a stop. He waited for her to make the first move. He felt Kelly's grip slowly lessen, and eventually she pulled away completely. He listened to her sniffle as she was most likely wiping away a few stray tears. Jason felt her sliding off, and he followed suit, following her into the house, neither of them saying a word.



"Did you find her?" Ashley called from the kitchen.



"Yea," Jason replied, walking into the kitchen behind Kelly.



"Hey," Ashley smiled at her. "You ready to eat? I cooked."



"Thanks, but I'm not hungry," Kelly replied politely, before going through the kitchen's side door.



Jason frowned, watching her walk away, "Has she eaten anything all day?"



"She snuck an apple before she left this morning," Ashley said.



"Ashley, we need to do something. "



"What? She's not listening to us."



"I think I'm gonna call our mom," Jason sighed.



Ashley frowned, "Do you really want to do that? I mean, do you know how pissed she'll be?"



"I know, but do you have a better idea?"



She sighed, "No, but give her a few more days, ok? We'll try again, and if not, then go head."



+++++++++



It was three in the morning and Ashley was wide awake. She was walking around the kitchen, pulling out a bowl, some milk, and some cereal. She sat at the snack bar to enjoy her early morning snack when the door bell rang. She jumped, cursing out loud as the milk she was pouring, spilt over the counter. She rushed to get some napkins and clean up the mess.



Who the hell was ringing the doorbell at three in the morning? She prayed it wasn't some crazed fan. That was the last thing Kelly needed right now--the entire world knowing where she lived. She decided to ignore it, hoping they would get the hint and go away. This time they knocked, probably thinking the doorbell wasn't working.



Ashley got up, sighing in agitation. She walked over to the door, trying her best not to chew out whoever was on the other side because she knew that would only upset Kelly even more. The only reason she was answering it was so they wouldn't wake up the short brunette.



"May I help you?" she asked briskly, opening the door. "Oh...it's you."



"Hi," the blonde replied nervously, with what seemed to be permanent tear stains on her cheeks.



"What are you doing here?"



"I need to talk to Kelly."



Ashley frowned, but stepped aside to let the girl in. Ashley led her back to the kitchen where she sat back down, eating her cereal.



Carrie looked at her confusedly, "So, can I see her?"



"She's sleeping."



"Oh."



"You see," Ashley frowned, putting her spoon down. "This is the first time she's slept in four days. She hasn't had an actual meal since we've been home. She hasn't had a full conversation beside the interviews in three weeks. And she hasn't smiled in over five weeks."



Carrie bit her lip, knowing that everything Kelly was going through was all her fault, "Well, is there anyway I could stay here? You know, so I could talk to her in the morning."



"What are you doing here?"



"Trying to talk--"



"No" Ashley sighed. "What is it you want?"



"I want to apologize. I want her bac--I miss our friendship," Carrie corrected.



"I know."



"Oh, ok. Well, I want her back, ok? I need her back. I need her in my life."



Ashley shook her head, "If you hurt her--"



"I would never hurt her."



"Yea, well it's kind of late for that statement. But, like I was saying, if you hurt her again, I swear you will wish that you had never met Kelly."



"That's impossible."



"Yea, well you don't know how many people truly care about that girl and would do anything for her."



"Ashley, look. I swear I will never hurt her again. I can't live through this again, alright? She wasn't the only one who was hurting."



Ashley's expression softened as she saw Carrie's eyes tear up, "I know. I'm sorry Carrie. It's just she's my best friend, you know? And she's given me so much."



"I understand that. I understand the need to have her in your life and the need to see her happy. Trust me, I want nothing more than to see her smile again," Carrie said, as the tears so started to fall.



Ashley nodded.



"So, I can stay?"



"Yea," Ashley nodded. "Come on, I'll show you to a guest room."



+++++++



Carrie pulled the blankets up around her. She couldn't believe it. It would all be over soon, the pain, the tears. The girl that she had been longing to hold could be just down the hall. She suddenly found it hard to breathe as her nerves took over. What if Kelly didn't forgive her? Or worse, what if Kelly couldn't come back from the place that she had locked herself in? Carrie would never be able to forgive herself.



She started to shake as the tears came. They were so many mixed emotions running through her--fear, nerves, anticipation, exhilaration, and the pain at the thought that she might still lose Kelly forever. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep, so she just watched the clock tick off minute after minute.