Anywhere But Home

~~NOTE~~ I am so sorry it took so long to get this chapter out but I've been without electricity for almost a week now..I just got it back this morning. I live on the Gulf Coast of MS so I was hit pretty hard by Katrina but luckily not as hard as others. I hope that everyone is ok that was affected by the storm..even if you weren't I still hope you're ok and thanks for reading this!


Her face said "no" but her voice said "yes".


"Where is home?" I asked hoping she'd say "with you".
"Jackson Street." she said while trying to keep herself from crying. I racked my brain trying figure out where Jackson Street was. It couldn't of been the neighborhood..the only neighborhood I knew of that had a Jackson Street.


Perfect homes with white picket fences that sheltered the happiest families on earth. Green grass with children and dogs running threw it. That was Jackson Street and this girl with tattered clothes and a mascara stained face did not come from there.

"What if I told you that's not where you belong?"
"I'd tell you I already knew that."
"Then why go back there?"
"It's all I have."

I pulled the car slowly out of the parking spot by the beach now graced with the lovely shades of red and orange that only belonged to dawn. It was the wee hours of the morning and I felt like someone had stabbed me and left me to rot..I must have been rotting for about ten days....


All was well and good on the drive home until we reached her house. I had seen it before. I had been in it before. It all hit me in a sudden flash. I knew who Amber was. I had met her a long time before. The memories came pouring back and my heart sank lower and lower with each one that hit me. Back then she was just the annoying little sister of one of my best friends, eggplant.


I started reminiscing about the glory days when I was young. It was 1989 when I first started to pay attention to that sweet faced two year old. I felt bad for her. All her parents ever talked about was how she was an accident. They forgot that she even existed around when she turned two. Even Eggplant treated her like she was an unwanted load that he always had to carry around.


I would buy her stuff with the little money I had from working at the small town restaurant. A little trinket here and there was all it took to make her smile. She was my shadow and then somehow 16 years later she became my love interest.


She began to drag herself from out of my car to the location of those who had turned their back on her so many years ago. She put her head down slowly when she headed off to her house. She had called it a home...I wished that she'd figure out her home wasn't there.


Abruptly she stopped in the dead center of the warm concrete. Her head swayed side to side as if she was battling herself mentally about where to go. I tore my car door open and jumped out of the seat. I ran breathlessly towards her shaking figure. I placed a hand on her shoulder and leaned in closely to her ear. I nuzzled her face gently with my nose and watched her melt into my arms.


While I held I her I whispered in her ear "I swear I'll never let you go."

She sighed and grasped me tighter and tighter. Then the grasp weakened and she stepped backwards and looked at me with confusion drenched over her face. "You sound really familiar." she said unsteadily.
"Oh, well...." I went frantic while trying to find an excuse. "I'm a singer so you might of heard of me."
She shook her head allowing her hair to be tossed around even more and said " Probably not. I'm not allowed to listen to a lot of different types of music...or watch TV."


I was stunned and I know my eyes bulged right out of my skull. Eggplants parents had always been so easy going.


"Ever since my brother died my parents got really strict."
"Yeah, but it wasn't the TV or music that killed him. It was.." I caught myself and pulled it together. "I mean..that didn't kill him right?"


She seemed so excited when I talked about Eggplant. Maybe she remembered that Billie from her past and hoped that he had returned again to save her.


Amber fell into my arms once again. She was tired and all her emotions were drained. I ran my stubby fingers down her creamy neck. Her nails dug deeply into my shoulders as I affectionately nibbled the same spot my fingers had brushed on her neck. My heart's pace picked up as she confidently said " I want to go to your place."


My house was dark and cramped with what seemed like hundreds of moving boxes that I still hadn't tackled even though it had been six months since I moved there. She shyly smiled at me as I leaned in for a kiss. She didn't even flinch when I slowly started pulling of my shirt. She even opted to help with the process. I pulled of her wrinkly thermal and tickled the skin above her belly button causing her to spasm slightly at the waist.


The sun was fully erect at this point and so were some other things. Amber teasingly pulled away as soon as she noticed the south pole had risen to it's full extent. The old Billie was gone and now a new one had taken over. I pulled her back over to me roughly. She moaned when I pushed all my weight into her. The moans were contagious and I couldn't help but let one out when I saw her up against the wall, half naked, and breathless. All the images I had of her as the lonely little girl vanished.


I cupped her thighs and pulled them apart. We were both fully nude now and already sweat was pouring down her flesh. I placed a single finger inside her and felt the moisture pour down it. She wasn't just wet, she was soaked.

All the blood had flowed to my penis and it was throbbing. I was ready to just rip threw her. I was about a centimeter away and more excited and more randy at that moment than at any other time in my life when she stopped me. "She must be a virgin" I thought. "18 years..wow..that's a long time to wait."

"Do you have a condom?"
"Oh, yeah. Let me go get one."

I walked away defeated. I was still horny but it just wasn't the same. By having to take the break all those thoughts of her as the lost little girl returned and haunted me to the point where I no longer felt like a man, only a pervert.

By the time I returned to my living room Amber had made herself comfortable and was standing with a blanket draped over her like a cape, over one of the few open, overflowing, boxes. She was as white as a ghost and the sheer look of "I'm about to puke." was written all over her perfect face.

In her arms laid her favorite toy given to her by me. A light brown teddy bear with a red heart sewed onto it's chest. It was missing a few pieces like it's button nose and a shiny black eye but it was still in pretty good condition. I gave it to her for her third birthday. She loved it so much she decided to name it Billie Joe after me, her best friend. As soon as I knew I was moving away to record an album I took it. I wanted to have something to remember that cherub cheeked girl by. I left without a trace...I never even said goodbye.

"Where did you get this?" It was more than obvious that she already knew the answer to her own question. She slowly slid down onto the floor and broke down in tears. "Why didn't you say goodbye?" she screamed in between her sobs.

"Because I couldn't see you...like..like this!" I unrightfully shouted back.
"And then you try and fuck me..you were all I had..why....did you..not care?"
"I did and do care. I didn't know it was you until recently."
"But you knew before you undressed me."

I bit my tongue to keep form saying yes. I didn't want to lie and I couldn't have her leave me.

"You're all I have now you know." I said smoothly to try and ease the blow of all that just happened.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I'm sorry.."
"No, no, I have to g-g-go."

She was hysterical and all the light in her eyes was gone just like all the hope I had that maybe my life, as well as hers, was taking a turn for the better.