Like nothing ever happened

Sometime later Robbie and I were sitting at the back seat of a black cab. Robbie had somewhat sobered up a little. He suddenly sighed and lay his head down on my shoulder.
“Why can’t I be gay?” he inquired.
Again I had to laugh. “Because you seemingly are not and the girls all love you. It would be such a waste,” I offered. He sighed again and snuggled a little closer.
“Yeah, that’s what everybody is saying. But why do all the girls I go out with try to change me? They nag at me partying, at the odd working hours. They want me to be absolutely fucking faithful, mind you. How can I know after a couple of meetings with all those dates in between, all of those opportunities, if you know what I mean, how can I know if it’s serious? If I want to be faithful at all? Maybe I never wanna be faithful.”
“I guess you will know when the right one comes along. I know it sounds corny but it is like that sometimes. Someone comes into your life and you just know that – wow! – this is it.”
“Well, I have sung songs about that but it ain’t never happened to me jet,” he grumbled. “But if I was gay it would be so much easier. I would find myself a nice older guy like you. Someone who would take care of me but who tolerates how I am. Someone who let’s me party and stuff and is not pissed when I don’t come home over night. A nice decent guy who can kick my ass if I mess things up too much. And, most importantly, who can fuck me senseless.” He grinned and looked up at me, eyes gleaming with mischief.
“Did you fuck your boyfriend senseless, Neil?”
“That’s none of your business, pretty boy” I told him with faked outrage. He giggled some more but somehow I got him to change the subject.
But he kept insisting that I come up with him to his hotel room. Knowing how stubborn he could be, I did not put up much resistance, figuring that he would be tiered soon and that I would be able to leave then.
When we had finally made it up to his room, not without having caused quite a bit of a stir at the reception of the good old Savoy – Robbie was singing again and trying to get me to sing along and complaining loudly when I refused, but had somehow managed to order two more bottles of champagne for us which he was now swinging widely over his head as he staggered along the corridor. As soon as the door fell shut behind us, Robbie threw himself on the bed and sighed heavily.
“Ahh, that’s much better now. Neil, would you be a darling and fetch some aspirin for me? They should be somewhere in the bathroom. I will take care of that lovely champagne we have here…,” he giggled.
“Do you think it’s such a brilliant idea?” I asked. “Given all the alcohol and stuff…?”
But Robbie only waved his hand dismissively. “Auntie Neil thinks I’m a naughty boy. No, it’s alright. Don’t you worry about my headache, will you?”
“Okey-dokey. It’s your head,” I shrugged and went over to the other end of the suit to find the bathroom and the aspirin. I had that in no time but as I stared at myself in the mirror, I found I could not get my mind off that little incident that had occurred at the Groucho Club. Robbie hugging me, Robbie getting hard, Robbie suggesting I should come up to his room with him, Robbie laying there on the bed… Breath, old boy, breath, I commanded myself. You are just reading far too much into this. Far too much… I opened the tub and splashed some cold water into my face, faced myself again in the mirror and smiled grimly. Wishful thinking may be one thing, I thought, but being totally foolish quite another. So I squared my shoulder and went back into Robbie’s bedroom.