You Terrible Memories

Hey guys, yeah sorry it took so long.
Been really busy.
Here you go.
:)

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ONE YEAR LATER

He stood there staring at his reflection.

Nothing.

He was nothing with out her.

This would be the last time he would have to look at his disgraceful face again.

Because tonight, tonight he was ending it all.

And all the painful memories that flooded his mind, will all be gone in time.

Yes, he will be missed.

Yes, tears would be shed.

But he wondered.

Will SHE miss me ?

Will SHE cry out for me ?

He would have many visitors at his grave, and there would hundreds beyond hundreds of flowers.

Will SHE visit me ?

Will SHE bring me a single red rose symbolizing her love ?

Or will she turn her cheek in vain ?

The questions raced through his mind as he dangled the gun in his hands.

" Do it. "

" Do it already. "

" What are you waiting for ? "

" DO IT ! "

" No. "

" Not yet."

" I have to let them know. I have to let her know. "

He gently placed the cold steel gun on the hotel dresser. And walked over to his suit case pulling out a video camera. He turned on the television, not liking the eerie silent. He then placed a chair infront of it, so the back of the chair was facing the front of the T.V. And the front of the chair was facing a night stand, where he set up the video camera. He wanted everyone to know why. He didn't want there to be speculation surrounding his death. He wanted everyone to know. He sat heavy in the chair. The camera started to record. And he began to speak.

“ You know, being born is so rude, when you don’t want to live.

I have tried with all my being to be alive again.

But to my dismay, no avail.

I remember though, a time where I could feel.

A time where one touch, one cool touch would send me on the edge.

But I cannot find you. You have disappeared, no where to be found. Not leaving one trace for me to follow. Not even my money can help me find you.

Today I wrote your name on a piece of paper. But it was erased.

Then I wrote your name on the mirror. But it was wiped away.

I also wrote your name in the sand. But the waves washed it away.

But a long time ago I wrote your name in my heart. And that’s where it will forever stay.

That’s when a mystical sense of reality hit me.

I cannot escape the chains of love’s grip.

And this is why it has to end.

For the pain I’ve caused, I know you will never forgive me.

And the thought of not being able to complete my kiss to you.

Is worse than death. “

Was the last thing he said as he reached for the gun on the dresser. And turned off the video camera.
He took in one last breath. And closed his eyes, he thought about the good times, with his love. When suddenly his eyes flung right open when he heard a voice on the televison he recognized, all to well.

He turned slowly facing the t.v to see her face staring back at his.

“ So, Miss Hopes is it ? “ the interviewer asked.

“ Yes, Delilah Hopes. “ Delilah giggled.

Gerard mind went completely blank. He was so over joyed to hear her voice. To hear her laugh. He walked over to the t.v and sat right infront of it, the gun still in his hands.

“ How do you feel about all the success over you book. ? “ she questioned.

“ It feels good. You know I worked really hard for this. “ Delilah said modestly.

“ So tell me about your book. I, mean I read it, and let me tell you. It was amazing ! So is this girl is she a friend is this a fictional character ? And this guy ? C’mon tell us we all are dying to know. “ the interviewer pleaded.

“ Well, it’s kinda a biography about my life. I used different names for the character but the things that happen are real. “ Delilah said quietly.

“ So the Sara is you and Dave is your ex boyfriend ? “ she questioned.

She continued hesitantly about the touchy subject.“So..... you were really pregnant and you really did lose the child ? “

“ Yes. “ Delilah said weakly.

“ I cant believe how brave you are. To share your whole story with the world. You are an inspiration. “ she said. “ I mean your brave enough to write about when you tried to commit suicide. And to be able to talk about the loss of a child, and a lover. Cause you don’t speak to this man anymore, do you ?

“ No. “ Delilah said looking away.

“ You are a very strong woman. You’ve been through a lot. And your so young ! “ she complmented.

“Haha, Thank you, you know writing this was really therapy. It was a way to get over it, to move on from my past and continue in my future.” Delilah said.

“ Well thank you so much for talking to us. And if you what to know more about this amazing book, go buy it at any bookstore nation wide. And Delilah, you will actually be in Chicago tomorrow to do a book signing ? “ the woman asked

“Yes, that’s correct. “

“ Well thanking you so much for coming. “ the woman said shaking her hand.

“ Thank you so much for having me. “ she smiled in return.

And the program ended.

He sat there unsure of his emotions. As the credits rolled. A single tears fell from eye, running down his cheek.

He wasn’t sure if the tear was from the joy of seeing her.

Or the pain of the memory they had just talked about.

Or the betrayal he felt for having his personal life published for anyone eyes to read. People judging him. Not knowing his story.

But he knew one thing. He was going to be at that book signing tomorrow.

He looked down at the gun in his hands. And decided he was going to save this bullet. For something special. So he packed it away and left the hotel room in search of the airport.

“ I’m coming darling, I’m coming. “ he whispered.

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