Playing With Fire

++++++++



Kelly smiled as she felt a pair of familiar arms wrap around her from behind her as she rinsed out her mouth the next morning. She straightened up to find Carrie smiling back at her in the mirror.



"Merry Christmas," the country singer greeted, kissing the curve of her neck.



"Merry Christmas to you too," Kelly replied, turning around in her arms to face her. "How'd you sleep?"



"Amazingly well, actually."



"Good," Kelly grinned as she wrapped her arms around the other blonde, pulling the two of them closer together.



Carrie licked her lips at the sight of the familiar spark that was growing behind the hazel eyes that were staring up at her. Kelly leaned forward on her toes, pressing their lips together in the slowest of kisses.



"Kell..." Carrie warned, her heart echoing in her ears.



"Yes..." Kelly smiled, kissing her once more.



"God," Carrie groaned. "Do you have to be so good at that?"



Kelly laughed as she brought a hand up to cradle the blonde's face as she kissed her, tugging ever so gently on her bottom lip before running her tongue across it.



"We...can't...here," Carrie protested.



"You sure?" Kelly asked, her voice rough as she traced a finger along Carrie's jaw and down the singer's neck.



The softest of noises escaped her lips as the Texan placed a gentle kiss just under her chin.



"Well, if you're sure..." Kelly smiled, pulling away.



"Wait," Carrie protested, finding her voice as her hands clutched to the sides of Kelly's shirt.



Kelly raised an eyebrow as a smirk grew on her face.



"Just one more," Carrie pleaded.



Kelly laughed as she leaned forward once more, kissing the girl before her softly. Carrie sighed into the kiss as her lips parted instinctively, deepening the kiss, but all too soon it was over as they heard a gentle knock on the bathroom door.



Kelly couldn't help but giggle at the look of sheer disappointment on Carrie's face as they pulled apart.



"Girls?" they heard Carrie's mom's voice call from the other side.



"Y--" Carrie cleared her throat. "Yes?"



"Just wanted to make sure you two were up," Carole replied. "Breakfast is on the stove, and will be ready soon."



"Thanks mom," Carrie called back.



"So how's your Christmas going so far?" Kelly grinned as they heard her walk away.



"Promise me that when we move in together we can do that again every morning."



"What? Get interrupted by your mom?" she teased.



"You know what I mean," Carrie laughed, reaching out for her.



"Nope," Kelly shook her head, backing out of the bathroom. "We agreed on one more, and I am a woman of my word, sorry."



"Kell..." Carrie fussed.



"Merry Christmas," Kelly winked as she walked out of the bathroom, closing the door behind her.



++++++++



"So what time is everybody getting here?" Carrie asked excitedly as the three women sat around the table.



Carole turned to Kelly who just smiled in response of the country singer's change in attitude.



"They won't be getting here until later this afternoon," her mom replied.



"And um...is Dad...I mean will he..."



"Why don't you two go for another walk, huh? It's really nice outside this morning," Carole suggested.



Carrie nodded in understanding as she stood.



Kelly gave her a soft smile as she stood as well, taking her hand.



++++++++



"It is nice," Kelly commented after having walked for a considerable time in silence.



"It's cold," Carrie mumbled, kicking the ground as she walked.



"Care..." Kelly halted, turning to the country singer.



"No, it's ok," Carrie replied, wiping her eyes. "You were right. I'm just being selfish."



Kelly felt her heart drop at the amount of pain that were in the pair of eyes staring back at her.



"I was wrong Care," Kelly admitted. "He's your dad. You have every right to be upset and hurt, and for me to say otherwise wasn't fair to you."



Carrie's gaze fell to the ground as she sniffed hard.



"You ok?" Kelly asked at the sight of the tears falling down the country singer's cheeks.



"It's the cold," Carrie lied.



Kelly wrapped her arms around the other blonde, pulling her close. It wasn't long before she felt her warm tears against her neck as Carrie held on to her tightly.



"Better?" Kelly whispered.



She could feel Carrie nod against her as more tears started to fall. Kelly kissed the top of her head, rubbing her back soothingly. This definitely wasn't how she pictured her first Christmas with the country singer going.



++++++++



"So, I'm guessing Santa didn't pass?" Kelly asked , earning a small laugh from her girlfriend from where they had settled sitting, leaning against a fence post that was perfectly placed in the sun. Kelly wrapped her arms tighter around Carrie who was curled up on her lap.



"He probably realized you were here, and was like nope, nevermind," she teased.



"Oh whatever. You probably got enough coal in your stocking to fuel an entire factory," Kelly retorted.



Carrie laughed, resting her head on Kelly's shoulder, breathing in the sweet smell that always surrounded the other singer.



"No, we just wait to do the whole gift thing until everybody gets here," she explained.



"So, I take it from the attempt at a joke that you're feeling better?"



Carrie sighed, "Not exactly. But this is our first Christmas together, and I want it to be happy and memorable, you know?"



Kelly nodded, watching a pair of birds settle onto the grass before them. She felt a pair of soft lips graze her neck.



"Care," she giggled.



"Sorry," Carrie grinned. "Couldn't help myself."



"I bet," Kelly laughed, feeling Carrie slide their hands together.



She soon felt those very same lips gliding across her skin once more. This time she decided to let the country singer be because the fact was, it felt so freaking good to have her touching her like that again. Carrie brought her free hand up to Kelly's jaw, tilting her face upward to give herself more access as she turned in her lap to get more comfortable.



Carrie continued to kiss the smooth skin languidly, relishing in every kiss, realizing just how good Kelly's skin felt beneath her lips. She smiled against Kelly's neck as she felt the Texan's hands fall to her waist, pulling her closer. She kissed her way down her girlfriend's neck, nipping playfully at her collar bone before bringing her hands up to unbutton the top buttons of Kelly's shirt. She started to make her way along the newly exposed skin, following the V the open shirt formed as Kelly started to arch into her warm kiss.



Carrie's hands found their way under the back of Kelly's shirt to the small of her back, pulling the other singer closer to her. She could feel Kelly's lips press against the top of her head as her own hands slid under Carrie's shirt where they started to slowly caress the country singer's stomach back and forth. Carrie quickly began to kiss her way back up her girlfriend's body until she finally captured the Texan's lips in her own, kissing her heatedly.



"You have no idea how much I love you," Carrie sighed as they broke apart for air.



"Love me...or want me?" Kelly smiled at the sight of Carrie's darkened eyes following every move her lips made.



"Both," Carrie nodded. "Definitely both."



Kelly laughed, pulling her forward for another kiss as Carrie undid the rest of the buttons on her shirt, giving her hands free roam of the softness beneath them. Kelly tilted her head back as once again Carrie made her way down to her neck.



"Care..." she let out a soft moan, feeling as if every touch from the Oklahoma native were setting her skin ablaze.



"I know," Carrie breathed in between kisses as her fingers made their way down to Kelly's jeans, quickly undoing the button and sliding down the zipper. She reached back up, kissing her once more as Kelly wrapped her hands in her long blonde hair, severely deepening the kiss as she felt Carrie's right hand burning a trail down her lower stomach...



"Mooo!!"



The two girls jumped apart at the sound, Carrie falling off Kelly's lap and onto the ground.



"Shit," Kelly cursed as she hit the back of her head on the post that was behind her.



"You ok?" Carrie asked, pushing herself up into a sitting position.



"Yea," she sighed, rubbing her head. "What the hell was that?"



Carrie's shoulders shook with the effort of trying not to laugh as she pointed behind Kelly. She turned around to see a handful of cows staring at them interestedly.



"I think we have an audience," Carrie smiled.



"Well you know what?" Kelly said, pulling the country singer back to her.



"What?"



"They can watch," she replied, kissing her softly.



"Kell," Carrie giggled, pushing away.



"What?" she asked, her face still flushed from before the interruption.



"We can't do this here."



"Well you started it," Kelly reminded her.



Carrie shook her head with laughter as she pushed herself onto her feet.



"Come on," she said, holding her hand out to Kelly who begrudgingly took it, standing as well.



"Stupid cows," Kelly mumbled while redoing her jeans as Carrie helped her with the buttons on her shirt.



"We'll finish this later," Carrie swore, wrapping her arms around her.



"You better believe we will," Kelly replied, allowing Carrie to kiss her once more, sealing the promise.



+++++++++



"How do I look?" Kelly asked nervously as she entered the bedroom.



"You look great," Carrie assured her.



"I don't know," she frowned.



"Kell, would I lie to you?"



"Yea."



Carrie laughed, "No. Trust me--you look great. Why are you so nervous anyway?"



"Your sisters," Kelly stated. "I mean, you're not planning on telling them, are you? If you are, that's fine, I just want to be prepared this time."



"Prepared?" Carrie questioned, going back to the mirror to finish fixing her hair.



"Well, you did kinda catch me off guard with you parents. And if they're anything like Jason, I'm screwed."



"Jason?"



"You have no idea how protective he is and how much he hated you at first."



"I thought he liked me," Carrie replied, confused.



"Yea, when he thought you were single and into guys."



"I never said I wasn't into guys."



"Not the point," Kelly smiled. "The point is, your sisters scare me, and I haven't even met them yet."



"Well," Carrie said, turning to face her. "I'm not gonna tell them."



"No?"



"No," she shook her head. "I think we have enough to deal with with just my dad right now. I don't need it from them also."



"You think they wouldn't approve?" Kelly asked softly.



Carrie smiled gently as she reached out, taking the Texan's hands in her own and pulling her closer, "Kell, you know it's not you my dad has a problem with, don't you?"



Her eyes fell to the floor.



"That's like saying it's me your mom hates."



"I'm pretty sure it is you," Kelly mumbled.



Carrie laughed, "Yea, I think you're right."



Kelly gave a small smile.



"What I mean is, my dad really likes you. He does. I've never seen him connect with any of my friends like he did with you and that was just in a couple of weeks. It's not you that he hates. It's us."



"But that's the same thing."



"No, it's not."



"Yes, it is," she replied, firmly. "Us is who I am. That's what my mom didn't get. You are my life. There is no point of anything without you. Ok? So saying that he doesn't hate me, he hates us is like someone saying, I like your music. I hate your voice and your lyrics and your style, but I like your music. It just doesn't work that way."



Carrie looked at her, her eyes full of heartache.



"I'm sorry," Kelly apologized, letting go of Carrie's hands and wrapping her arms around the country singer. "I shouldn't have brought any of that up right now."



"It's ok," Carrie replied, resting their foreheads together. "I love you."



"I love you too," she smiled kindly. "And I wish that would just be enough for some people."



"It's enough for us," Carrie commented, the slightest hint of question in her voice.



"It's more than enough," Kelly promised, bringing a hand up to touch her cheek softly.



Carrie's eyes closed at the adoring touch, and Kelly pulled her into a warm embrace.



"Carrie," Carole said, opening the door. "Oh," she blushed as the two girls broke apart from the hug.



"It's alright mom," Carrie smiled, wiping her eyes.



"Are you ok sweetie?"



"Yes ma'am," she nodded as Kelly slid their hands together.



"Alright well, Shanna and them just arrived. So why don't you two come into the living room."



"Ok," she replied as her mom walked out, closing the door behind her.



"Let's go have some fun, ok?" Kelly smiled. "I think we deserve a good time, don't you?"



"Fun?" Carrie teased. "What's that again?"



Kelly laughed as she followed her girlfriend out of her room.



+++++++



"Hey!" Carrie greeted as her oldest sister pulled her into a hug.



"Let me look at you," Shanna replied, holding her at arm's length. "You've lost weight," she frowned.



"Alright mom," Carrie rolled her eyes, making Kelly laugh, turning the eldest Underwood's daugther's attention to her.



Kelly tried her best to give a warm smile, hoping her nerves weren't showing. She watched as Shanna cocked her head slightly to the side. Kelly could see the wheels turning behind her eyes. Her smile widened as she identified that look. She received it every time she walked out of the house. Whenever somebody was trying to figure out if she really was who they thought she was, she got that look.



"Hey," Kelly laughed. "I'm Kelly--"



"Clarkson," Shanna nodded with a slight laugh as she turned to Carrie. "Has Stephanie seen her yet?"



"Nope," Carrie smiled.



"Stephanie?" Kelly asked.



"My other sister," Carrie explained.



"She's the middle child. Please forgive her," Shanna smiled.



"Well, she's not much of a middle child. She's ten years older than me," Carrie pointed out.



"Anyway," Shanna continued. "She's a huge fan of yours. And when I say huge, I mean you should have a body guard around you at all times when you're in this house."



"Can't wait to meet her," Kelly laughed.



Shanna nodded, eyeing her carefully.



"So where's the brats?" Carrie asked, noticing Kelly starting to shift under her sister's gaze.



"Chicken pox," she replied with a sigh as she walked fully into the house.



"You have kids?" Kelly asked, following them into the living room.



"Two," Shanna smiled.



"And where's the husband?" Carrie questioned as they sat around the living room.



"He'll be here later," she explained. "His parent's volunteered to take the kids tonight, but they're not gonna be home for another hour or so."



"Hey mom," she smiled, standing as Carole walked into the room, enveloping her in a warm hug. "Where's dad?"



"Oh you know you're father," Carole smiled, waving off the question.



Kelly saw Carrie's gaze fall to the floor, "So, Shanna, Carrie said you are a teacher?"



"Yea," Shanna nodded, quickly falling into the change of subject.



+++++++++



There was a knock on the door, and Kelly's ears perked up. The other three women in the room had started to catch up on all the local gossip about people she didn't know. It didn't take her long to zone out.



"I'll get it," Kelly said, standing as they continued to talk. She walked to the door, opening it to find what had to have been Carrie's other sister, Stephanie, standing there.



"Hi," Kelly smiled.



"Oh my God," Stephanie breathed.



"I'm Kelly," she held out her hand.



Stephanie let out a slight shriek as she jumped on the short Texan, pulling her into a tight hug.



"Care!" Kelly called out helplessly.



"Let her go," she heard Carrie's laugh behind her. "You're gonna suffocate her."



"Is this my Christmas gift?" Stephanie asked, finally pulling away.



"She's not a toy," Carrie smiled, moving Kelly a safe distance away from her sister. "Sorry," she said softly. "We tried to warn you."



"It's ok," Kelly laughed, nervously. "It's um, nice to meet you," she said, holding out her hand which Stephanie shook, vehemently.



"Oh my God," she repeated. "Kelly Clarkson is standing in my doorway."



"Um, do you want an autograph or something?" Kelly asked politely.



"Are you serious?" Stephanie beamed.



"Sure."



"No," Carrie replied.



"Carrie..." Stephanie argued.



"She's our guest, Steph. You do not ask guests for autographs."



"But she offered," she pointed out.



"Because she's a sweetheart, and I'm not gonna let you use her like that."



"Care, it's no big deal," Kelly said.



"No," Carrie repeated.



Stephanie frowned, "Fine."



"Do you need help with anything?"



"No, he's got it," she said pointing to the man with shaggy brown hair walking up behind them holding a tray of food in his hands. "Seriously Carrie, you have got to try this marriage thing. It's great."



"I'll keep it in mind," she rolled her eyes, making Kelly laugh.



+++++++



"So Kelly," Stephanie smiled as all of them sat around the living room, waiting for dinner to be ready. "When's your next album coming out?"



"Steph," Carrie scolded.



"It's ok," Kelly laughed. "Um, it should be coming out at the end of this year."



"I heard it's gonna be country," Stephanie commented.



"Um, country influenced, but still pop."



"You know. You should do a duet with Carrie."



"Mom," Carrie whined, looking for help.



"Stephanie," Carole warned.



"If we could find the right song, I'd love to," Kelly smiled, looking over at the country singer who smiled in return. "That would be a problem though, finding a good song."



"Yea, cause I mean the two of you. That would be a lot of expectation."



"Yea," Kelly nodded.



"So you've got some new songs already?"



Kelly laughed again as she saw Carrie bury her head in her hands next to her, "Yea. I'm always working on new stuff."



"Anything I can hear?"



"God," Carrie breathed.



"How bout this," Kelly replied. "When the CD's done, I'll send you an autographed copy."



"Really?" she squeaked.



"As long as you promise not to put it on ebay."



"I swear," she said holding up the sign for scout's honor.



"Then yea."



"Oh my God, you are so my favorite of Carrie's friends," Stephanie beamed.



"Now can we please stop harassing the girl?" Carrie asked, looking out from behind her fingers.



"Yea," Stephanie's husband replied with a smile. "I'm starting to get worried that I'm about to lose my wife to another woman."



"Please, you know that's one of your fantasies," Stephanie replied.



"Ok then," Carole interrupted. "Definitely time for change of subject."



"Where'd you say Dad was again?" Shanna asked.



"Oh, he's just working on something. You know how he can be. He probably just lost track of time. He'll be here shortly."



+++++++++



"I think my eggnog got lost," Kelly laughed, standing up. Carrie and Shanna had gone into the kitchen nearly fifteen minutes ago to get drinks, and still hadn't returned. "I'm gonna go check on it."



"Ok," Carole nodded with a smile.



Kelly walked into the kitchen, unnoticed by the two sisters.



"Something's wrong," Shanna frowned, eyeing her baby sister.



"Everything's fine."



"Then why isn't Dad in there with us?"



"You heard mom: he's working on something."



"Carrie, we all know that's bull. This is his favorite holiday. He's usually more festive than any one of us during Christmas."



Kelly felt her heart sink at this statement.



Carrie's eyes fell to the floor, "I know."



"So...you've been here the past couple weeks. What's going on?"



"Nothing."



"Carrie."



"Shanna."



Shanna sighed, "Fine. Be stubborn. Go ahead. I don't care that this Christmas is going to suck."



"Um," Kelly cleared her throat, announcing her presence as she saw the tears forming in Carrie's eyes.



"Oh," Shanna said, eyeing the Texan. "Hi."



"Hi," Kelly replied.



"I'll just bring these into the living room," she said, picking up a couple glasses of eggnog.



Kelly nodded, watching as the eldest Underwood daughter walked out. She made her way over to Carrie, pulling her into a hug.



"I'm sorry," she whispered in the taller blonde's ear.



"It's not your fault," Carrie sniffed.



"Yes, it is. Your family's Christmas is gonna ruined because of me."



"And yours wasn't?"



"Yea, but my mom's a bitch. Your dad's just, well, he needs to understand."



Carrie pulled back from the hug to be able to look into those hazel eyes that she loved so much.



"I'm gonna fix this," Kelly promised.



"Kell, it's not yours to fix."



"Yes, it is," she countered. "You're hurt, and it's my job to make you unhurt."



Carrie laughed softly, "Well, if it's your job..."



Kelly nodded, looking around before kissing her softly.



"Mistletoe," she said with a smile.



"I don't see any mistletoe," Carrie replied, looking above them.



"Use your imagination," Kelly grinned.



++++++++



Kelly closed the door to the barn carefully, her eyes taking a while to adjust to the dimly lit building.



"St--Mr. Underwood?" Kelly asked softly as she walked up to him.



"Kelly," he sighed, closing his eyes. "You shouldn't be here right now."



"I think you're making a mistake," Kelly replied, nerves coursing through her.



"Please leave."



"If you would just take the time to see that I love your--"



"Go!" he said fiercely.



Kelly swallowed hard.



"Please," he added, his voice softening.



"Ok, but I have to say this first," she said, her voice shaking. "My mother found out about us in a much different way than you did, but she didn't take it so well either. You see, that's why I'm here, sir. According to her, I'm no longer her daughter. I no longer have a family."



She took a steadying breath as she watched Stephen pause what he was doing.



"You raised an amazing daughter," Kelly said, caught off guard by the tears that were starting to fall. "She has such an beautiful heart, and she loves you so much. You have no idea how hard this is on her. Seeing the pain in her eyes is enough to break a complete strangers heart. I know what that feels like sir, and if you truly loved your daughter, you would do anything to have her not feel this way."



She sniffed hard, wiping the tears away, "Like I said, I love your daughter. Now I know that probably doesn't mean much to you because you don't know me. But I take love seriously. Carrie is the first person I've ever said I love you too, and I swear to you that I mean it with my entire being. This...this isn't something we chose or asked for. It happened, and honestly, I believe that I am the luckiest person in the world because it happened with her. You may not agree with this or with how we feel, that's fine. But she's your daughter, and she needs you to be there for her. This hasn't been easy for either of us, and it's only bound to get harder, and she needs her daddy there to help her. So, yea," she nodded, disappointed by her ending.



"Then why do it?" he asked, quietly.



"Huh?"



"Why do it if it's only going to get harder?"



"Because..." she began thoughtfully before smiling. "Because when I look into your daughter's eyes, I can see all my dreams. And when those dreams come true, she's the only person in the entire world that I want standing right beside me."



Kelly watched him for a moment longer before turning to leave.



"Kelly..."



She stopped, turning to face him.



"You said your mom, she didn't agree with you."



"Yes sir."



"I suppose she, I mean, did she ask you to choose? Between her and Carrie, that is?" Stephen questioned.



"Yes sir."



He took a deep breath, "And you..."



"I'm here aren't I?" Kelly replied before turning and walking out of the barn.