Coming Home

"Sake?" I asked, watching Die reach into a bag.

"Iie." He pulled out a bottle. "Beer." He poured some into several cups. "You ate?" When I nodded he grinned. "Now you drink. We'll sit here, and talk, and drink, and... help you forget."

"Die's right."

Kyo arched a brow at Kaoru. "He is? I thought that was a phenomenon that never occurred?"

Kaoru snorted a laugh. "We drink and talk and cheer Suji-chan up. And we don't mention a certain brother who's being a baka."

Saika grinned. "Hai!"

Die continued to pour into the cups. "You still play piano?" he asked to start the conversation.

I took a hesitant sip, and then nodded. "Hai. I also play bass, guitar, and drums."

"You do?" Kyo blinked, startled.

"I taught her drums," Shinya announced. He grinned suddenly. "I taught her drums, and in return she taught me..."

"We know what she taught you," growled Die.

"...piano," Shinya continued as though never interrupted. He arched a brow at his older brother. "Whoa, testy, Daisuke?"

I downed the beer, and held the cup out for more. "Shinya, stop instigating. Die, stop being a baka." I shook my head. "I thought this was cheer Suji up?"

Shinya nodded, and put an arm around me. "I'm sorry."

Die refilled my cup. "You can let her go now."

"Suji-chan, pick one of them soon before killings occur out of anger or frustration. And I don't just mean both of these baka! The rest of us might kill them to save our own sanity," Kaoru stated.

Saika choked on her sip of beer. "Shinya? You want her too?"

Shinya flushed, and his gaze moved and locked onto my startled one. "I always liked her. Since the first time she defended me. But you loved..." He wet his lips, and shrugged. "So I never said anything." His fingers moved in a soft caress on my shoulder, his arm still around me. He was blushing, but never broke eye contact. "I still remember how you felt when we kissed."

My mouth must have hung open. Shinya liked me? All this time? I blinked, and couldn't look away from his eyes.

Die snorted. "Like? I love her!"

Shinya broke eye contact, frowning at the other. "Are you the only one capable of loving, Die?"

I shifted away, and downed my beer. Whoa, this was... a lot to take in at once. What a hell of a day! "It doesn't help if you two keep arguing. Less fighting, and more drinking." I held my cup out. Oh God, now what? Toshiya can't look at me, but Die and Shinya both admit they want me! I waved my cup in impatience.

"Do you love any of them?" Saika asked, trying to be helpful.

"I... don't know. I mean I care for both because we grew up together, but I always loved..." I glanced at Shinya, and then Die. Neither was quite meeting my gaze, and I understood they didn't want to press me. This was awkward as it is.

"Mama says a kiss never lies. You'll know with a kiss," Kaoru stated.

"Hai, she always says that," Saika nodded.

"But I've kissed both, long ago!" I reminded.

"So kiss them again," Kyo nodded.

"And if I still don't know?" I asked, wondering if I'd really know.

"Then kiss me," Kaoru teased, winking.

"Oh for fu..." Die began, and halted when Kyo smacked him upside the head.

"The thing is to let only the kiss influence you. Not who it's from," Saika stated. "We can blindfold you."

I shook my head. "I know their cologne, and the sound of their footsteps. Plus, their hair..."

Kyo grinned. "Then I have an idea. Die, Shinya, go home and wash. Use the same soap and the same shampoo. No cologne. Saika, you make sure that Suji-chan is blindfolded, and lend her your mp3 player. She shouldn't be able to see or hear. We'll leave only a lantern on."

Everyone grinned. I frowned. "I don't know about this... Wouldn't it look bad for me to be kissing both of them?"

"It's for a good cause," Kaoru reassured as the two men stood and got ready to go. "And if, as you say, you still don't know... then we let them fight to the death."

Kyo laughed as I shot a glower to the oldest of the boys.
.................................................

I felt like Sleeping Beauty in some twisted version of the fairy tale as I lay there, blindfolded and listening to music and waiting to be kissed. How the hell had I agreed to this? Well, let's get this baka thing over with. Knew from a kiss? It could all be a waste of...

The bed dipped, and I gasped, unprepared for it. My hands shot out, in reflex, and were caught by larger warm ones. My heart is pounding in fearful anticipation. For what feels like forever nothing happens, and I begin to worry. My hands are released, and a fingertip, gentle and slow, touches my cheek, sweeps down my jaw, and over my chin to my bottom lip. That fingertip still touched my lip when I then felt the soft caress of warm breath, and then lips touching one corner of mine, brushed over my bottom one to chase the fingertip away, and then disappeared.

I stopped breathing. Was this Die? Or was it Shinya? Before I could try to ponder it the lips were back, settling fully upon mine, lingering, and making me sigh in pleasure. This was nice. Nice turned to hot when that warm mouth slanted over mine, a tongue touched my lips, skimmed over my teeth, and thrust boldly in to touch mine. I moaned low as it stroked, teased, and urged me to kiss back.

Unable to stop myself I slid my hands up his arms, but before they got to the elbows he'd caught them, and pinned them to the mattress near my head, his body leaning more over me now. I made a frustrated sound, but he refused to let them go. His head lifted a fraction, and I arched up, blindly reaching, and found his bottom lip with mine. I felt the vibration of a groan against my lips seconds before he pushed me down to the mattress once more, kissing me deeply, and he moved my hands up so he could hold both in one of his larger ones. His free hand slid down my arm to the side of my breast, hesitated, and then the thumb shifted and touched my nipple, which hardened immediately in response.

I'd never let anyone touch me like that before. That one simple touch rocked me to the core. And then he suddenly pulled away, and I lay there panting, wondering if he was still there. Would he kiss me again? Who had it been? Would Shinya have dared to touch me like that? I could see Die touching me that way. But then again, hadn't Shinya blatantly taunted Die a few times? Maybe he wasn't as shy as he used to be?

Trying to figure out who it was would only drive me crazy, and maybe influence this... What the hell would this be called? I also began to wonder, if I chose one, how the other would feel? I didn't want to hurt either of them.

Maybe I never should have returned.

It seemed I lay there thinking for an hour when I felt the bed dip again. Once again my heart sped up in anticipation. I lifted a hand, and it was caught in a larger callused one. Warm mint-y breath caressed my lips just before a gentle mouth did. It brushed over mine once, twice, and a third time. Taking the initiative I caught that full bottom lip between mine, and touched my tongue to it. His tongue came out, tasting of mint and tea, and stroked against mine. Mutually we slanted our mouths, wanting to deepen the kiss, our ragged breathing mingling, and neither of us in any hurry to end this pleasant interlude.

He shifted, trailing his moist lips over my chin and down to my throat. I moaned softly, reaching with my free hand to grasp his hair, but it barely touched before he caught it. He nibbled the skin of my throat, slithered his tongue around to my ear, and suckled just below the lobe. I shifted, twisting to arch into him, but he moved, and when his mouth took mine this time it stole my breath before he softened it to smaller tender ones, and then was gone.

That had to have been Shinya! It had to have been! So tender, so gentle but with a touch of passion. Yes, it had to have been Shinya!

Okay, well... Both men had been great kissers. Oh yes. So how did I choose? Well, first I had to take these damn earphones out, remove the blindfold, and go find them. Saika had said they'd wait downstairs in the front yard. Reaching up I was about to remove the blindfold when hands stopped me. My heart leapt. What the hell?

I hadn't felt the bed shift beside me. But I certainly now felt the heated breath and warm lips that touched my mouth. Those lips cradled my bottom one, let go, and then caught at it again. This time a tongue swept over it, teased the crease of my mouth, and my tongue hesitantly came out to meet it. He pulled back slightly, and then kissed me once more. He pulled back slightly, and I pushed up, trying to free my hands to touch him. He pinned them behind my back.

"Shinya..." I breathed at his lips.

He crushed my chest to his, kissing me hard again and again, stealing my breath with deep kisses. Then his wet lips slid over my jaw, down my neck, and to my collarbone. Head falling back I panted, the wild thudding of my heart louder than the music in the earphones. For a moment he did nothing else, his hot breath fanning over the skin he'd moistened, and making me tremble.

"Shinya?"

He retraced the path back to my lips, and once again the familiarity of his kiss, tinged with a hint of experience and naughtiness he'd never before had, stole my breath away. "Please, let me touch you," I whispered at his lips, but instead his grip tightened on my wrists. One more deep kiss, and then he was gone, and it was so sudden I fell back panting.

Three? I ripped the blindfold off, and as I rushed out of the room and down the stairs I pulled the earphones out. I bolted out the front door, breathless. "Who?"

They turned to stare at me. "Suji?" Saika asked.

"Who else kissed me?" I demanded. At their blank looks I grabbed a porch post, and leaned heavily against it. "Three times I was kissed. Who kissed me twice?"

Die's eyes narrowed, and he spun towards Shinya. "You little..."

"It wasn't Shinya," I defended. "I remembered his kiss. He was the last one. But there were two others. One was you," I nodded to Die. "Or did you kiss me twice?"

"I wish," he mumbled. He turned to Kyo and Kaoru. "Was it one of you?"

Saika shook her head, coming up the steps to me, and looking into my eyes. "I swear no one went up before Die, or between him and Shinya. We were together."

I shook my head. "He kissed me, Saika. He kissed me, and..."

Kyo hmm-ed, and pulled out his cell. He hit auto-dial, and put the cell to his ear. "Where are you? Ahhh... okay, we'll see you soon." He hung up. "I thought..."

I gave a bark of humorless laugh. "Toshiya can't even look at me. How could he kiss me? He hates me..."

"He doesn't hate you," Kaoru soothed. "He just doesn't feel as deeply as you do."

Saika nodded. "He's right. So... did a kiss tell you?"

I hugged myself. "Iie. I went from turned on to more turned on. If anything I'm now more confused than ever before."

"Oh for fuck sakes!" Die exploded. "I love you. He never said he did!" he motioned towards Shinya.

Shinya glared. "You never gave me the chance to talk to her or say much of anything." He faced me. "You asked me about our pact, and I said I never had. Almost, but never had. I was waiting... for you. I knew you'd come back someday. I knew Japan would call you home."

Saika grabbed her twin's arm. "Pact? What pact? Why didn't I ever know about it?"

"We made it the day I was leaving. I begged Shinya to run away and marry me so I would never have to leave Japan. As always he was sensible, and knew we'd never survive on our own at that age."

Kaoru grinned. "You loved Toshiya, but proposed to Shinya?"

"He never would have said yes. He never even said goodbye. Neither did you," I told Die.

He'd been glowering at Shinya, but now he turned his glower on me. "If I didn't say goodbye you wouldn't leave," he admitted. "Except you still went. I was so angry with you. I hated you for a whole week." His lips thinned, and he looked away, remembering when he'd finally admitted to himself I wouldn't come back, and he'd cried. In the barn where he'd kissed me.

"I remember that," Kyo nodded. "Boy, were you a real prick then. No one knew why."

"Totchi knew," Die replied. "He'd known for four years how I felt."

"Hated me?" I blinked. "I didn't want to go! I wanted to stay here! I hadn't done anything!"

"I loved you, and you left!" he shouted, all his pent up emotions from back then resurfacing. "I had half the money saved for a damn promise ring for you, and you left. And when you did, I..."

We all stared at him, stunned. "Ring?" I choked.

Saika's jaw fell open. "You? Gigolo Daisuke? Wanted to give a girl a ring?"

Cheeks flaming, Die half turned away, his hands fisted at his sides. "I spent the money on something else. Something I knew you'd hate," he told me. "You always said I was a tease and male whore." He snorted in sarcasm. "I spent it on a whore, except I was so angry at you all I could do was bitch about you for that whole hour." He glared at me. "She told me I should have saved my money to go after you."

Kaoru and Kyo were unashamedly laughing, leaning against each other for support.

"You paid a whore..." Kyo began.

"To listen to you cry over Suji-chan?" finished Kaoru.

They erupted into even more gleeful laughter. I smacked them both upside their heads. Then I covered my face with my hands. How mortifying! "Oh God! I..." I couldn't do this. This was too much. The whole day had been nothing but one emotional roller coaster ride after another. I felt drained and listless. "I'm going to bed."

"Okay, come on," and Saika took my hand in hers. "I'll make tea to help you relax..."

"Iie. Arigatou," I hugged her. She'd always been my soul sister. "I need to be alone."

Kaoru and Kyo sobered quickly. "Mama will never let you sleep here. No electricity, no phone..."

"She has no choice." I turned for the house. "Minna-san, oyasuminasai."

"Suji..."

Shinya shook his head. "She won't listen to any of us. Better we should get her the things she'll need to be sure she'll be okay."

So within a half hour I had blankets, pillows, lanterns, Mama's cell phone, thermos of tea, and lunch box of food, and clean sheets for the bed. Saika had even packed my diary and I was able to try to word my thoughts and feelings as I ate cold rice balls and sushi.

The cell rang several times. First time was Kyo, with Kaoru in the same room as him, checking up on me. Then it was Die, worried and telling me once more he loved me. Then Shinya. "I... wanted to be sure you're okay."

"Hai, arigatou."

There was a moment of silence. "If you need me..." His voice was low and soft.

My heart leapt. "Hai, arigatou."

"You have Mama's cell so all our numbers are on it."

"Hai."

Another pause from him. "Hai."

For a moment I remembered his kiss, familiar but so much more experienced, and I remembered our pact. "Shinya-kun..."

"Hai?"

I paused. "Arigatou." I couldn't. Not... yet.