Even Your Shadow I Miss
folder
Singers/Bands/Musicians › HIM
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
16
Views:
1,835
Reviews:
11
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Singers/Bands/Musicians › HIM
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
16
Views:
1,835
Reviews:
11
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of HIM. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Part Eight
This part takes place three years in the past, when Bam was twenty-two and Ville was twenty-five.
Natalie Imbruglia owns the song.
Even Your Shadow I Miss
Part Eight
I want you
But I want you to understand
Bam was out nearly as soon as he and Ville got in the cab. His head dropped onto Ville's shoulder, his mouth parted slightly. The older boy smiled and gave the driver directions to the hotel. Bam acted like a punk-ass teenager most of the time, despite the fact that he no longer was.
But at moments like these he was like a child, an innocence creeping into his demeanor. Brown curls fell into his face, dark lashes contrasting with his skin, arms clutched to his chest like a child, legs curled up underneath him.
"Take us to the back." he said when the cab got to the hotel. After throwing some bills at the driver, he scooped Bam into his arms and carried him up to the door, smiling when two hands grabbed onto his shirt and a head nuzzled against his chest.
He sat up for hours watching Bam sleep. Kid hasn't slept in three days and a twelve-hour drinking binge didn't help. Ville knew what a risk it was, but he planted a soft kiss to Bam's cheek before climbing into bed and closing his eyes, quickly slipping into dreams he'd never admit to.
In the other bed, Bam was shaking. Two voices in his head were arguing back and forth: wishful thinking and harsh honesty.
He kissed me! Ville kissed me. He held me and he carried me up to the hotel.
Ville kisses everyone. That's the way he is. You're no different.
It had been easier to pretend he was asleep. He practically was anyway. He couldn't walk in a straight line if his life depended on it. He turned over in his bed, staring at the blurred and shadowed form of his best friend.
They usually slept in the same bed. They didn't know why, it just happened. Bam couldn't understand why Ville wasn't lying next to him. He closed his eyes as tears ran down his cheeks.
Ville had been more quiet than usual all night, especially with him. At time he seemed terrified that Bam was going to pass out at the bar from exhaustion and too much alcohol. At other times he seemed terrified to touch the younger boy.
If he knew, he'd hate me.
Sometimes Bam thought Ville suspected that his adoration for the green-eyed poet was abnormal, an obsession, a lustful wish. Sometimes when Ville looked away from him or pulled away from his touch he could swear he saw anger and fear in his friend's eyes.
What he didn't see was the mirror between him and Ville, the mirror that reflected the anger and fear back at the other man, deep inside of himself. He didn't see the dreams that Ville was having at that moment, the same dreams Bam had every night.
One sided love on both side of the tracks because a train in the middle was blocking them from seeing the signs reading 'I love you' in the other's shaking hands.
Haven't you wondered
Why you're finding it hard
Just looking at me
---TBC---
Did the backstory work?
Reviews? Critiques?
Natalie Imbruglia owns the song.
Even Your Shadow I Miss
Part Eight
I want you
But I want you to understand
Bam was out nearly as soon as he and Ville got in the cab. His head dropped onto Ville's shoulder, his mouth parted slightly. The older boy smiled and gave the driver directions to the hotel. Bam acted like a punk-ass teenager most of the time, despite the fact that he no longer was.
But at moments like these he was like a child, an innocence creeping into his demeanor. Brown curls fell into his face, dark lashes contrasting with his skin, arms clutched to his chest like a child, legs curled up underneath him.
"Take us to the back." he said when the cab got to the hotel. After throwing some bills at the driver, he scooped Bam into his arms and carried him up to the door, smiling when two hands grabbed onto his shirt and a head nuzzled against his chest.
He sat up for hours watching Bam sleep. Kid hasn't slept in three days and a twelve-hour drinking binge didn't help. Ville knew what a risk it was, but he planted a soft kiss to Bam's cheek before climbing into bed and closing his eyes, quickly slipping into dreams he'd never admit to.
In the other bed, Bam was shaking. Two voices in his head were arguing back and forth: wishful thinking and harsh honesty.
He kissed me! Ville kissed me. He held me and he carried me up to the hotel.
Ville kisses everyone. That's the way he is. You're no different.
It had been easier to pretend he was asleep. He practically was anyway. He couldn't walk in a straight line if his life depended on it. He turned over in his bed, staring at the blurred and shadowed form of his best friend.
They usually slept in the same bed. They didn't know why, it just happened. Bam couldn't understand why Ville wasn't lying next to him. He closed his eyes as tears ran down his cheeks.
Ville had been more quiet than usual all night, especially with him. At time he seemed terrified that Bam was going to pass out at the bar from exhaustion and too much alcohol. At other times he seemed terrified to touch the younger boy.
If he knew, he'd hate me.
Sometimes Bam thought Ville suspected that his adoration for the green-eyed poet was abnormal, an obsession, a lustful wish. Sometimes when Ville looked away from him or pulled away from his touch he could swear he saw anger and fear in his friend's eyes.
What he didn't see was the mirror between him and Ville, the mirror that reflected the anger and fear back at the other man, deep inside of himself. He didn't see the dreams that Ville was having at that moment, the same dreams Bam had every night.
One sided love on both side of the tracks because a train in the middle was blocking them from seeing the signs reading 'I love you' in the other's shaking hands.
Haven't you wondered
Why you're finding it hard
Just looking at me
---TBC---
Did the backstory work?
Reviews? Critiques?