I Can't Look At You Anymore

****GERARD'S P.O.V****

I sat in my room most of the day.

I should have been hanging out with my Gran but I couldn't.

I had hurt Mikey and I was feeling guilty about it.

I had said it to hurt him, but it was true.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in," I mumbled.

"Gerard, are you feeling okay?" My grandma came and sat on my bed next to me.

"It's nothing Gran, Mikey and I had a disagreement over Melissa"

"Oh Gerard, she's a nice girl, but you don't love her do you?"

"No but how did you know?"

"I'm your grandma, Gerard, there's not much I don't know about you." She smiled.

I nodded, but Melissa is my key to normal, I can't let her go.

"I have bingo tonight, Gerard. I'm going to stay at Wendy's, she lives much closer to the bingo hall. I made yours and Mikey's dinner, it's in the oven just heat it up when you're ready."

She hugged me and left my room.

I waited for her to leave and went looking for the cordless; I found it in Mikey's room.

I stood in his room and dialed his number, his phone was off.

Fuck where is he?

After trying a few more times, I settled on Melissa.

"Hello? Can you come over? I'm home alone; I want you (Mikey) Melissa."

Half an hour later it was getting dark, there was a knock at the door.

No sooner had I closed the door, I had started to pull her clothes off.

Slowly making our way to the stairs.

"Gerard, why the sudden change in mood?" Her voice annoyed me, so I grabbed her face and pulled her lips to mine.

They were sweet, due to some kind of gloss.

I screwed my face up.

Her lips didn't taste like Mikey's.

"Gerard?" She was looking at me cautiously.

"Shhh, baby lets go upstairs." I said hanging her bra on the hand rails.

She was kissing me furiously all the way up the stairs.

I had made her wait for this, before whenever we'd made love, she'd be the one instigating it, and I never did not once.

We arrived at my bedroom door.

I kneeled down and freed her from the last item of her clothing with my teeth, her panties.

I opened the door and threw her on the bed.

She squealed in excitement.

I Turned off the light so I didn't have to look at her.

I pulled my shirt off, then my pants.

I could feel her eyes piercing me through the darkness waiting for me eagerly.

I crawled onto the bed and ran my hands up her thighs.

She shook with anticipation.

I kissed her stomach as I made my way up to her face and nibbled on her bottom lip.

It wasn't doing anything for me at all.

I wanted Mikey.

She grabbed hold of my cock and started pulling in rhythm with my tongue in her mouth.

Still I felt nothing.

I pushed her hand away.

"Are you okay?"

I rolled on my back. "Suck me off Mel."

She hesitated, I knew she hated it.

"But Gee,"

"Come on, Mel!" I said, so she did.

I smiled.

I closed my eyes and imagined holing his glasses for him as he wrapped his plump wet lips over my hard and ready cock.

Watching his hands wander up and down my legs and stomach as the tingling of the ecstasy he was providing was spreading through my body.

He was swirling his tongue over every inch of it.

I tilted my head back, biting my lip, fighting the moans.

"Mmmm, that's it there, oh yeah."

He smiled and went faster.

Knowing it drove me so close.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck." I whispered.

I would take him in my mouth straight after this; I knew he loved it when I got him back.

The thought of him rock hard in my mouth was enough to send me over the edge.

"Oh fuck! Mikey!" I yelled as I came.

He started choking.

No not Mikey, Melissa.

She spat on my sheets.

"What?"

"Melissa." I said.

"No you said Mikey!" she said

"No I meant you, Mel." She got up off the bed.

"You and Mikey? Gerard that's sick!"

"Mel, it's not like that!" I said as she ran out of my room, picking up her clothes as she left.

I heard the front door slam.

Then laughter.

Mikey laughing.

He walked in holding his stomach.

"Oh Gee, that was hilarious!"

"Mikey, I..."

"Oh I know, you didn't mean to, baby, and it's not like that." He narrowed his eyes, "but Gerard, if it's not like that, then what's it like?"