Without You

Title: Without You Author: Madonna Kelly Rating: R Pairing: Hayden Christensen/Ewan McGregor Summary: Hayden and Ewan fall in love but, of course, things go all wrong. Disclaimer: These events never took place, this is pure fiction. I am not nor am I associated with Hayden Christensen or Ewan McGregor in any shape, way or form. Author's Notes: This is for Jasmine and Ley, my two dear slashers and beta masters. Thankx for holding my hand during this process. Also, this is my first story that I've posted here. Please give me feedback! I want to know what I'm doing both right and wrong.

Chapter One

I lie on the bed, staring at the ceiling as the first beams of light began to cascade into the room. A lit cigarette, half smoked, rests between my fingers. I bring the cigarette to my lips, and take another long puff. Plaguing thoughts swim through my mind, and I slightly ponder when the last normal thought joined the pool.

Ewan. I’m thinking about him, again. Correction. I’m thinking about him, and I, and our relationship. My eyes fall shut, I feel my heart begin to pound. My memory takes me to a time when we first met, how my heart use to pound then, just like now.

The cool, confident way he used to stride into a room that made me envy his c'ockiness. I desperately wanted to know everything about his persona. The way his body moved as he performed difficult stunts transfixed me. I would pleasure myself at night to thoughts of his erotic motions.

He stole a kiss from me once. We were enjoying a calm moment on set, and tender lips grazed mine so gently. Perhaps he feared my lips would shatter into a thousand pieces had he pressed any harder. How I wanted to grasp the back of his neck, and plunge deeply into the heat and moisture of his mouth. This gentle kiss started the affair.

Hiding our passion from prying eyes challenged both of us, almost as challenging as separating from one another. The saying that we couldn’t get enough of each other was an understatement. If there was ever a moment that we parted, it was either brief or on set.

We would talk at night, sometimes. His strong arms cushioning my body as he stroked the locks from my forehead. Butterfly kisses danced on my face as I confided in him all of my hopes and fears for the future. We made love on other nights. Shudders ran through my body, experiencing a pleasure never before known. His head nodding up and down, again and again, as he orally pleasured me. My eyes rolled back in their sockets, fingers tangled in his hair as moans of ecstasy escaped my throat. I was falling in love with him. But one day, it stopped.

Everything just stopped.