The Night Before Christmas -- J-Rock Style

T'was the Night Before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas, And All through the house
Not a Jrocker was stirring, Not even a mouse
The tabi were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that Saint hide, soon would be there...
The Rockers were cuddled at (ahem) snug in their beds
While visions of fanservice danced in their heads
And Hyde in his kerchief and Gackt in his cap
Had just settled in for a long winter's nap

When out on the street there arose a clatter
That Gackt rolled off of Hyde to see what was the matter
Away to window he danced like a fag
Tore open the curtains and stifled a gag
The moon on the asphalt with the new fallen snow
Gave the impression of rush hour to the travelers below
When what to Gackt's wondering eyes should appear
But a miniature tour bus, and eight freaky reindeer

With a little old driver so colorful and shway
He knew in an instant it had to be Hide
More rabid then gerbils his coursers they came
And he whistled and catcalled and shouted each name!!!
"Screw Kaoru, Screw Tetsu, Screw Ishii, and Ruki,
on Totchi, on Aoi, on Mana, and Yuki!
To the top of the table, to the living room wall,
in the back of tour bus, now screw away all!!!"

And then with bump, Gackt heard on the roof
The humping and thrusting of each little poof
As he drew in his ass and was turning about
From the toilet Saint hide sprung with a shout.

He was dressed in all pleather from his hair to his toe
And his clothes were all tarnished, with TP in his fro
And a bundle of goodies he'd flung on his back
He looked just like hooker showing her rack.

His eyes how they twinkled, his dimples how mery!!!
His cheeks (wink wink) were like roses… his uh… nose… like a cherry

His cute little smirk was curved up like a banana…
And flipped us off smartly, and donned his bandana.
The stump of a pixie stick held tight in his teeth,
and the powder encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a cute face, and little toned belly,
He staunchly proclaimed that his clothes weren't smelly.

He was funky and cool, a mischievous elf
Gackt laughed when he saw him, in spite of himself
With a wink of his eye and a nod of his head
Gackt knew in an instant he had nothing to dread

Saint hide said little, but when straight to his work
Doffing his pants, the came with a jerk
Filling stockings, then blowing his nose,
And giving a nod, in the toilet he dove…

He sprang in his sleigh, to his hoes gave a whistle
And away they all danced, like a heat seeking missile
But I heard him exclaim as they drove out of sight,
"HAPPY ****ING TO ALL!!! AND TOO ALL A HOT NIGHT!!!"