Passive Agressive

~Disclaimer~
I don't know Orlando Bloom, and I don't claim this ever happened. Purely for my amusement.



A/N: My friend gave me the idea for this story. She actually meant for it to be Orlando Bloom trying to get a rise out of Viggo Mortensen, but I am not quite capable of writing slash just yet. Maybe someday?

I finally finished it. It was really difficult to write, and I'm not sure I like it still. But here you are.

~*~

Orlando opened the bedroom door to find her laying docilely on their bed. She didn't look up from the book she held against her right knee. She didn't acknowledge his presence at all.

"So you're still mad at me?" He asked as he closed the door behind him.

"Of course not," he jumped at the sound of her voice. He hadn't expected any response at all. Her eyes continued to dart across the page.

"Well then." He stood leaning against the door. After about thirty seconds, he gave up waiting for her to look up at him. He walked to the end of the bed and stood staring down at her. After a minute without any response, he sat on the end of the bed. She turned the page and continued reading. Orlando gently picked up her foot and massaged it tenderly. He looked to her face to see her response, which was simply to continue reading as if nothing was happening.

He continued to massage her foot as his eyes roamed her body. She was sitting upright, leaning against the headboard as she read. Her right leg was bent, and her left was in Orli's hands. Her hair fell in loose curls around her shoulders, and she work sparkling blue eye shadow that matched her simple fitted blue t-shirt. She wore a short jean skirt, and the positioning of her legs allowed him to see the blue satin of her underwear. His eyes lingered for a moment, and he no longer desired just a simple response. He wanted to hear her scream his name.

He put down her foot and climbed up the bed, pressing his body against her side.

"Get your shoes off the bed," she murmered without looking up. He grinned and kicked his shoes off the edge. "Thank you." He pressed his lips lightly at the point where her neck met her jaw. Her only response was to tilt her head slightly, giving him better axcess. He smiled as he trailed light kisses down her neck. When he reached her shoulder he sucked gently on her skin. He inhaled the sweet smell that surrounded her as he moved back up her neck toward her ear. He traced the curve of her ear with the tip of his tongue. He buried his face back in her neck as he drapped his arm over her ribs, his thumb resting just below her breast.

His fingers lightly brushed her side, sliding down to her waist. He pulled back and looked at her determinedly expressionless face as he ran his fingers under the end of her shirt. He bent down to kiss her cheek as his hand slid back up her side until his fingers felt the satiny texture of her bra. She sighed heavily as he blocked her vision by putting his face in front of hers. He looked into her eyes, which refused to focus on his. He laughed at her stubburness and lowered his lips to hers, at the same time tugging at her shirt with both hands.

His tongue found no resistence as he pushed it through her lips. He explored her mouth gently, tasting white chocolate on her teeth as he traced them. He pulled away, noting her lack of response but smiling at her lack of protest. Her shirt was scrunched up just over her breasts, exposing her blue satin bra. He almost laughed at the fact that she matched from head to toe, whereas he was lucky to find matching socks if she didn't lay things out for him.

When he finally looked up at her face, he noticed she was again reading her book. He groaned quietly and reached for the book. She sighed again as she released it to him.

"Could you mark the page?" He nodded and bent the page corner before leaning across her to lay it on the nightstand. "Thanks," she muttered.

"You sound so sincere," he whispered in her ear as he trailed his hands down her arms to her wrists.

"Oh, I am," she answered, rolling her eyes at him. He gripped her wrists gently and, bringing her arms over her head, folded them gently on top of her head. He slid his hands down her body to her waist, and then pushed back up, dragging her shirt over her head. She watched him detatchedly as he discarded it next to the bed, his eyes never leaving hers.

He grinned as he leaned in to kiss her, his lips pressing against hers, his tounge darting out and in quickly. He left open mouthed kisses down her chin, her neck, as he took her arm and place it at her side. He nipped gently at her collar bone as he slid his hand down to her skirt.

"Darling?" he murmered into her as his fingers slid between her skin and the fabric of the skirt.

"Yes?"

"Would you like me to stop?"

"Do as you wish."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure; do what makes you happy." His fingers worked expertly at her skirt, and soon he left her neck and used one hand to lift her hips and the other to pull the skirt down. It fell to the floor. Orlando lifted her leg, and pressed his lips to her ankle. His lips wandered up the inside of her leg, slowing as they reached her theigh. When he neared the satin of her underwear, he returned to her opposite leg to begin again. When his lips again neared her underwear, he paused a moment before crawling up her. He let most of his weight rest on her.

"Are you enjoying yourself?"

"You know what I like, Orlando."

"That I do, love." He looked at her a moment and tucked a stray curl behind her ear. He slid his hands under her, and she arched her back up obligingly as he unhooked her bra. He slid it gently away from her body, licking his lips unconciously as her breasts were exposed to the warm air. His breathe quickened, and his cock became fully erect, as his mouth closed around her warm nipple. His tounge flicked around the erect nub, and his hand lifted to massage her other breast. Her breathe continued steadily as he switched breasts, and soon his available hand slid down her stomache and rested on her hip, his thumb playing absently at the elastic of her underwear.

"Are you ready for me?" His lips brushed against her skin, and his breath cooled the wetness left by his warm tongue.

"Whenever you're ready." Her words were carefully controlled, her breath too perfectly even.

"Will you help me undress?"

"If you wish it."

"I do," he grinned. "Can you take off my shirt?" She sighed heavily as she sat up so they were on their knees facing eachother. She unbuttoned his shirt quickly, and he grabbed her wrists and moved her hand up his stomache and chest to his shoulders, where he released them as she pushed the shirt off his shoulders. "My trousers, please?" She reached down, without bending over, unbuttoned and unzipped them, and again he grabbed her wrists. He climbed off the bed so that he stood in front her her, nearly at her eye level as she was on her knees on the bed. "Take my pants off as well." Her small hands slid under the elastic of his boxer breifs, soon his clothes were discarded and his erect penis was free. He pushed her gently so that she laid back across the bed, he gently removed her blue panties and gripped her under her knees. He spread them apart as he climbed back on the bed between them.

He caught her eyes, and she finally reflected his smile with her own as he slowly entered her. He wasn't really suprised at how wet she was, despite her supposed indifference. He paused once he was fully inside of her, his eyes closing as he savored the warmth and tightness of her. He laid down on her, his lips brushing her neck as he slowly slid back out. He put his arms on either side of her head, resting his weight on his forearms. He opened his eyes and looked at her, her bottem lip caught in her teeth and her arms laying by her sides.

"Do something with your hands," he panted as he drove slowly back into her. Her arms slid up over her head, her forearms resting on her curls that were spread out across the bed as she wrapped her fingers around his wrists. He slowly increased his pace, his eyes roaming over her. From her breasts to her lips to her eyes to her hair, never pausing long on one feature. Her breath was hitching in her throat as he reached a frenzied pace, and she gasped as she squirmed beneath him. Suddenly his pace all but stopped, and he moved slowly in and out of her a few times. She looked up at him pleadingly. As he pulled out one last time, he paused for a moment as he reached up to massage her breasts. As soon as his hand touched her chest, he plunged quickly down and squeezed her breast simulatneously. Her inner walls clutched at him as she came, her back arching as he screamed his name harshly, unwillingly. He continued to pump quickly as he came inside her, and soon he had collapsed on her as the waves of his orgasm washed over him. She sucked in deep breathes, as she slowly recovered. He lifted himself up and kissed her gently, and this time she responded vigorously.

~*~


A/N: I am considering doing a second chapter, from her point of view. I'm not sure. At any rate, I love reviews. So please let me know what you think.