Baby Can I Hold You

She knew she knew everything, how though? Kelly really hadn't gave any clues away, she was to careful of that. Even her own mother was in the dark about Paul and she told her mother everything.



After the shower both girls hadn't said a word to each other, both went about doing what they had to do before lunch. Kelly got herself dressed while Carrie cooked lunch for the three of them. It was 12 now which meant Paul wouldn't be home till 3pm. That gave her enough time to get Elle down for a nap and find out exactly how Carrie found out. Maybe the blonde had seen one of the many bruises on her body, it could only be that. Kelly had been very careful about what she told Carrie or anyone for that matter, not that she seen many people these days. Paul had put a stop to her visits to Ashley's , the only time she saw her oldest friend now was when they worked together but Kelly was far to scared of Ashley seeing any bruises that she stopped asking her on tour.



After getting herself dressed Kelly made her way to find Carrie, not finding her downstairs she went upstairs finding her and Elle both laying together in bed talking. She stood silently at the door listening to her daughter talk a mile a minute about her new toys she got at her birthday. Carrie for her part lay next to her, heads pressed together listening and nodding at what Elle was saying. Her daughter sounded so happy at that moment and she knew it was because of Carrie, even though she tried her hardest to make her daughters life a good one the little girl wasn't the most outgoing. Everyone said she must get it from Paul which made Kelly want to vomit, she didn't want her daughter to get anything from her father. Instead of jumping around making up imaginary things to do like Kelly did when she was little Elle would sit quietly in her room playing with her dolls, not bothering anyone. Kelly could see now that maybe Elle was an outgoing child when she was allowed to be but with Paul's constant moods the little girl couldn't.



Carrie looked up feeling Kelly standing at the door, lightly kissing Elle's head she made her way towards kelly leaving the young child to cuddle up to one of her many stuffed bears. Without saying a word carrie slipped her hand into kellys and lead the young mom away from the bedroom and down into her own bedroom. Silently shutting the door behind them carrie pointed to the bed telling kelly to sit down. Kelly didnt know what carrie was planning the quietness of the blonde was scaring her.



She watched her walk from the bed towards the large walk in wardrobe after a few seconds she was out again carrying a large bag with her.



'carrie what are you doing' kelly was now up on her feet making her way towards carrie.



'what I should have done the moment I came here. Im getting you out of here.....this stops now.'



'carrie no.. look no you cant' kelly tried her hardest to get the bag back from carrie but she wasn't having any of it.'



'you like being a punch bag or something?' carrie had stopped struggling with kelly and stood directly in front of her. ' you enjoy this Kelly.' she grabbed onto Kelly arms pulling and pushing the girl. ' you like being touched like this. Does this turn you on or something.' Carrie pushed Kelly back causing her to stumble a little.



'what no.. Carrie stop it, why are you so mad.'



'why am I mad? Why am I mad...... god Kelly look at you... look what you've let him do to you.' Carrie tried her hardest to keep her voice low, she really didn't want to scare Elle any more than she was already.



'I..I didn't' Kelly really didn't know what to say not once did she think that Carrie would think this was her fault too. She had always seen on TV that it was all the man's fault and now here she was listening to her best friend tell her she was the one to blame, it wasn't just pauls sick mind.



'when Kelly? When did this start?' She was calmer now.



'the first time?' Kelly felt her legs couldn't hold her weight any more, throwing herself on the bed she put her hands over her face. Maybe if Carrie didn't look at her she could be truthful with her.



'yes' Carrie knelt down in front of Kelly placing her hands on kells knee's



'remember the night we all went to Nero's for the first time?' Carrie nodded. Sure it had been years ago but she could still remember dancing slowly beside Kelly watching her hips sway to the music. It was probably the first time she had been so close to Kelly. ' After you went to sleep on the sofa and we went to bed well I woke up and he was on top of me with his hands around my neck. that was the first time.' kelly kept her hands over her face,she really didnt want to see carrie's sad eyes right now.



'but kelly you had only been dating him a few months then......what made you stay.....why didnt you shout for me..... I was right downstairs. ' carrie felt sick now, she had been in the same house while her best friend had been getting abused.



' he told me he was dreaming.. he cried, begged me to forgive him... he seemed so sorry.' kelly knew it sounded stupid now but at the time she really did believe he would never do it again.



'so why not leave the second time he did it, or the third or any other time after that....why marry him have a kid with him?' carrie was trying her hardest to really understand what would make kelly stay 8 years.



'Cause every time he would do it he would promise it was the last......after a while it began to be my fault... I made him get angry... if I just did what I was told he wouldnt do it... but I cant do anything right.'



'do you hear yourself?' Carrie couldn't recognise the woman sitting in front of her, it wasn't the same Kelly she knew. ' and don't tell me he does it for your own good... am I right? He bruise you cause you make him and no one else would put up with you so you should feel lucky that hes there and not leaving you too.... is that what he says to you?' kelly nodded lifting her head to look at carrie. 'and you believe this crap?'



'yes..... cause hes right'



'bull and you know its bull......theres a million people out there dying to be with you if you would only let them..... hell theres one right infront of you now that would kill to call you hers.....so dont tell me your worthless......cause I wont let you talk about the woman I love like that.' even with the anger in carrie's voice that had to be the sweetest thing kelly had ever heard. She sadly smiled at carrie before throwing herself back against the bed.



'did you just say you loved me?' carrie laughed before climbing ontop of kellys legs and straddling her stomach.



' yeah and all the years ive spent practising how to say it that really wasnt how I planned it I promise. ' carrie let her hand gentle rub over kellys stomach.

'how long have you...you....well you know.' kelly struggled to say the words.



'loved you?' kelly nodded. ' mmm lets see.....round about stuff like that there..... yeah round about then.' Kelly looked at her confused causing carrie to giggle. ' when you sang stuff like that there on Idol......i knew I had to have you then.' carrie smiled down at kelly as she sat up alittle resting her weight on her elbows.



'but you hadnt met me then.....how can you want me if you havent met me?'



'baby million of your fans havent met you either....doesnt stop them from wanting you too.... you just give off very sexy vibes.....we cant help but fall for you.' carrie placed both her hands had the side of kellys arms so they were both face to face , inches apart.



'yeah but usually when they do meet me that want leaves them.....im really not that sexy.'



'well I dont know about them but my want just grew.' carrie winked.



'oh yeah?' kelly was breathing heavy now.



'yeah' Kelly could feel her lips being pulled by what she could only think of as an invisible magnet that had to be carries lips. She could almost taste carrie, licking her lips she watched carries mouth open.



'KELLY.....KELLY'



'Oh god hes home.' kelly leaped from the bed causing carrie to fall in a heap on the floor. She sat there in shock watching kelly run around the room making sure everything was how it should be. ' carrie please... please dont start anything with him.... please..... just pretend you dont know... please' carrie hated hearing her beg, she quickly nodded pulling herself up onto the bed as the bedroom door opened.